Mental Health Today

Fear Is Not Always A Bad Thing: It Can Actually Be Your Friend! If you struggle with fear this statement may seem wrong or at least paradoxical. There are a lot of things to be fearful of in our world today. All you have to do is turn on the news and you'll hear about killings, attacks, robbery, riots...you name it! It's no wonder millions of people are plagued with a magnified and distorted view of fear. How can fear be your friend? 1. Fear can get you out of your comfort zone. 2. Fear can keep you safe. 3. Fear can motivate you to take action.  If you struggle with a distorted or magnified view of fear try to focus on the evidence. What you KNOW to be true, not just what you feel to be true. The next time you have a distorted view of fear write down your thoughts and feelings about it. Then write down what you know to be true. Remember, fear in and of itself cannot hurt you. Try to not allow your distorted view of fear tell you otherwise. Don't allow your magnified view of fear become your maste

Anxiety and The Walking Dead. Wait...What? You have surely watched the hit TV show The Walking Dead. Okay, I admit it. The Walking Dead is one of my favorite shows. Why?   For several reasons: 1. I have always had an interest in film make up and special effects. The Walking Dead brings that out big time. 2. I have always been a huge fan of zombies. The classic zombie movie, directed my thee George Romero, The Night Of The Living Dead. Classic movie with special effects and a genius use of lighting and shadows. Without CGI. 3. I have always liked shows that depict the human spirit to live and survive. As I watch The Walking Dead I am struck with the parallel between living with a mental health disorder and Zombies. In particular Living with Anxiety. How Living With Anxiety Is Like The Walking Dead To be clear anxiety is the Walkers in my comparison. Anxiety is always waiting to eat you. Anxiety won't go away on it's own. No matter how fast you try to hide from it, it will not go away. Anxiety is ugly a

Battling The War Within with Force Recon Marine and Pro-MMA Fighter Chad Robichaux Chad Robichaux and Mighty Oaks Warrior Programs - Chad Robichaux did 8 tours of duty as a Force Recon Marine, he is a Pro-MMA fighter, a pastor, an AACC accredited counselor, a husband and father - who nearly lost everything to PTSD. Chad found God and was saved and healed. Now he, his family and other Special Forces leaders are sharing this message. The Mighty Oaks Warrior Program is the only PTSD faith-based program endorsed by the Military.  By teaching the principles of Biblical manhood, Mighty Oaks can boast a program that is drug-free, cost-free, faith-based…and, by the Grace of God, there have been no suicides after anyone has gone through the program! Chad has two books released:Marriage Advance, Love Never Gives Up. A 26-week workbook for couples that addresses brokenness to restoration in Christ.  Redeployed: How Combat Veterans Can Fight The Battle Within and Win the War at Home. A book co-written with Brian Fleming.

This is a very special edition of The John Cordray Show to honor the brave men and women who serve our country to give us freedom. Meet Anthony Ferro, a Marine who is no longer on active duty, who served two tours in Iraq, and who suffers from PTSD. Listen to Anthony as he talks about his PTSD and what he is doing about it. War, PTSD & Recovery with Anthony Ferro Anthony is a Marine who has served from 2003 to 2007, he served two tours in Iraq in 2005 and 2006.  Anthony almost died several times in war during his tours. Now, Anthony is finishing his college degree in Business Management, then he plans to pursue his master's to become a therapist.  Anthony is currently on disability, but he not letting that keep him down. Anthony volunteers at a gym to help instruct and teach others and he is a Mixed Martial Arts fighter.  Anthony say's "I am still trying to adjust to the regular world and I try and learn about PTSD as much as I can." If you suffer from PTSD please seek help from a profess

How Stress Is Making Your Anxiety Worse Stress is the number one factor of many mental illness including anxiety and depression. Most leading experts agree that if we reduce our stress levels, we'll reduce anxiety and depression as well.  The Problem:We are all stressed, but some are over-stressed. Most of us are more concerned about taking care of others, that we neglect ourselves to the point of exhaustion. We give and give to others, but neglect ourselves. We can run on empty for so long, and then we'll run out of gas - stranded. Stress is so dangerous to our health because it's a silent and often a slow process of deteriation of our body from the inside out. 1. Stress can cause a lack of sleep.2. Stress can cause burn out.3. Stress can cause marital problems.4. Stress can cause diseases such as cardiovascular disease, cancer, and other organ damage.5. Stress can wear down our imune system that can lead to other problems. Stress can cause and be the root cause of anxiety, fear and anger. The So

Hot, Healthy & Happily Ever After with Hilary Silver For many marriages, the mundane daily routine creates a stale and passionless marriage. It's anything but hot, healthy and happily ever after! Hilary is making a difference in the lives of many men and women who want to have the relationship they desire. If your marriage lacks passion, desire and connection you'll want to listen and hear what Hilary has to say. Hilary Silver is a Licensed Therapist, Relationship Expert and Creator of Hot, Healthy & Happily Ever After. In the last 15 years, her counseling and coaching programs have helped thousands of men, women and couples live more authentically, find deep inner joy and contentment and keep their love and passion alive for the long term.  Hilary teaches how to transform our challenges into our greatest strengths, how to achieve genuine connection in relationships and to how to live intentionally to create the life we desire.  Hilary has been featured in The Good Men Project, YourTango, Co

"I’m going crazy. I can’t stop. I’m the only one with this problem. I hate myself. I’ll never be normal again. I can’t even look at myself in the mirror. I’m too embarrassed to go outside.  There’s no hope. I can’t let anyone know. What’s wrong with me?" These repetitive thought patterns plague someone who suffers from this condition.  This compulsive behavior transcends age, gender, culture and socioeconomic status. It can hinder everyday living, lower self-esteem, and create anxiety and stress over a lifetime if not treated. Millions of people are affected by it everyday (about 4% of the world’s population), wow! Little is known about it, and few mental health professionals have seriously studied the origin or treatment of it.  What is it?  It’s a condition known as Trichotillomania or Trich – a compulsive hair pulling behavior. The technical term is an impulse control disorder where people have a very hard time resisting the urge to pull their hair. What is Trichotillomania?Trichotillomania [Tric

No Longer A Victim! Healing From Sexual Abuse with Paula Mosher Wallace Sexual abuse can be so devastating and can be a deep secret for many years. So often people who have been sexually abused are living a life full of shame and self-loathing. In this episode you'll hear from Paula Wallace, who was sexually abused as a child, and now uses her story to help others who are healing from sexual abuse. Get to know Paula Mosher Wallace and her ministry and book, Bloom in the Dark. Born in the jungles of Peru to missionary parents, Paula’s beginning in life was anything but typical. Raped at the age of 5, Paula was caught in a cycle of damage and abuse which lasted into her thirties. From sexual abuse to later mental, emotional and even spiritual abuse, Paula developed a victim mentality, which fueled decades of continued abuse. The trauma she experienced caused her to develop a variety of psychosomatic illnesses which, at times, left her bed-ridden. Broken beyond endurance and suicidal, Paula cried out to G

When I was a kid I loved Sesame Street. My favorite character was Cookie Monster, Bert and Ernie, and Big Bird, okay they were all my favorites.  But, the one character that stood out the most to me, was a character that didn't seem to fit in with the rest of the characters of Season Street.    He lived in a trash can. You guessed it, Oscar the Grouch.   Oscar was a professional complainer. He complained about the weather, he complained about his home, he complained about his friends. Oscar complained about everything.   No wonder he lived in a trash can!   I was thinking today about why people complain. Why do I complain? Why does my family complain? Why do my clients complain?   I think it boils down to this...   You and I complain because we are not content.   We're not content with our current situation. We're not content with our finances. We're not content with our car. We're not content with our relationships. We're not content with our living environment.   Don't get me wro

I am trying something new here, I am recording my podcast episode while I am scoping a live periscope. So, this podcast episode was recorded in front of a live audience.    I am so glad that you have joined me today. Let me ask you a question. Do you get angry?   If you're a funny person, you may answer my question like my father-in-law would, "Does a bear poop in the woods?"   If you're a shy person you may just answer my question in your head.   If you're an angry person you may get offended by my question and you may say it's none of my business.   Whatever type of person you are I'm sure you get angry to some degree.   Here are 5 Personality Types of Anger:   The Stuffer: Someone who holds in their anger until their anger can no longer remain stuffed and then it comes out with a vengeance. The Exploder: Someone who explodes at the drop of a hat. The Silent Assassin: Someone who quietly seeks revenge or to get even. The Abuser: Someone who uses their anger to manipulate others o

Have you ever been driving and then got stuck in the mud or sand?  You get upset and press on the accelerator harder only to find your tire speeding faster and faster and deeper and deeper into the hole – then finally you’re so far down that you get really stuck.   Then feelings of hopelessness and loneliness set in making your day miserable. Have you been there?   Maybe you have never had your car or truck stuck, but you may feel like your life is stuck and miserable like that.  As a therapist, I have talked to hundreds of people who feel like their life is stuck. The harder they try to do something, the deeper they feel stuck. What are you dealing with that’s making you feel stuck in life? Some of the people that I have seen have dealt with high anxiety and they feel like they will never be able to be free of their constant feelings of inadequacy.  Some are dealing with depression and they feel like they can’t get past their dreadful thoughts of worthlessness. Others are struggling with their marriage and f

You have heard me say before, we all have a story of hurt and brokenness. In this episode, I am talking with Nichola Brown, a Licensed Clinical Social Worker. Nichola shares her story of abuse and pain and how she is using that to help others in their hurt and pain. Nichola Brown is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LICSW) in Washington, DC.    Born in Montego Bay, Jamaica, Nichola has lived in the DC metropolitan area for most of her life. She has been a Mental Health Professional for several years and enjoys working with individuals and families.    Nichola earned her Master's in Social Work from the University of Maryland-Baltimore, where she focused on Clinical Mental Health with a concentration in Employee Assistance Programs (EAP).    She has worked in the private and public sectors, where she has developed a passion for helping people find their calling. Nichola believes in embracing the journey of life.    Nichola credits her faith in God and seeking professional help, with overcoming her own t

Sometimes Nike's slogan 'Just Do It' isn't enough. Slogans and catchphrases are good, but sometimes they're not very motivating. They can sometimes have the opposite effect.   Fear, self-doubt, and emotional baggage often de-motivate us. Keeping us from doing things we really need to be doing.   Do you say things to yourself like:   1. What's the use? 2. No one really cares 3. Why start something if it's not perfect   I have thought these too, but you and I need to keep moving forward and not allow our negative thoughts to keep us from being and staying motivated.   What is it that you have a hard time staying motivated with?   Is it exercising? Is it keeping up with relationships? Is it writing a book? Is it starting a business?   What is it that you struggle with staying motivated to complete?   We can probably write a long list of all the reasons why we can't get motivated, but I want to talk about 5 Tips to help keep you going.   5 Tips On Staying Motivated When You Want To

Do you have self-doubt? I'm sure you do - we all do at some point in our lives.  Does this describe you?  You have an idea for a business, but you give up before you even try, because you convince yourself that no one will like your idea.   You want to ask your boss for a promotion, but you don't because you just know that he'll laugh in your face.   You have, what you think, is helpful information for your group presentation at school, but you remain quiet because you are afraid of looking stupid.   Giving up, not starting, or remaining quiet is often the result of self-doubts.   Have you been there? Have you had self-doubt about something in your life?   Sure you have - we all have.   I had self-doubts about starting my podcast show.   I had doubts that I knew what I was doing or how to launch a podcast. I had doubts that anyone would listen to me. I had doubts that my podcast would be helpful at all.   Our self-doubts can keep us from so many things: Friendships Career Advancement Reaching your

 Do you know what this feels like?   You have an important event coming up (presentation, interview, business meeting, going out to lunch) and it's a week away or a few days away, and that's the only thing you can think about.  You toss and turn and you just can't fall asleep because you're thinking about all of the things that will go wrong.   You think about how the "Spotlight" will be on you, you worry about messing up, and you worry about making a fool of yourself. Your heart beats faster and faster the closer the event gets, your palms get a little sweaty, and you feel like running away to get away from it all! Then, when you are in the moment of the event you realize that it's not as bad as you thought it would be.   After the event, you feel relieved or even ecstatic that you did it.  Then the anxiety hits again before the next event.  Does this describe you?  You know what it's like, don't you? The feeling of intense anxiety before an event that you need to do.   It

Perhaps one of the most recognized church songs, besides the song Amazing Grace, is the song It Is Well With My Soul.  Written by Horatio Spafford, 1873  Here is the first stanza of the song: When peace, like a river, attendeth my way, When sorrows like sea billows roll; Whatever my lot, Thou hast taught me to say, It is well, it is well with my soul. Back Story: Horatio lived with his family of 5 children (1 son and 4 daughters) in Chicago. Horatio was a successful lawyer and was a close friend to Dwight L. Moody, an evangelist from Chicago. Horatio was a very successful lawyer and was able to provide for his family well, but tragedy hit his family. Horatio and his wife, Anna, lost their only son to Scarlet Fever, and shortly afterward the Great Chicago Fire destroyed much of their possessions. A few years later Horatio decided to travel to England to hear his good friend D.L. Moody preach. Although, Horatio's job prevented him from leaving on time he sent his family ahead of him with the intentio

Nashville, TN is truly a wonderful place. It's the music capital of the world after all. But, I learned something deeper, more inspiring than music, something that will change my life forever in Nashville. This episode is my personal journey or discovery (nothing really new), but something inspiring happened to me at the American Association of Christian Counselors (AACC) World Conference.  This episode is my account of what I took away from the conference. The workshop speakers were good, the keynote presenters were inspiring, and the worship was amazing, but what really made an impression on me was... 1. It's good to stay connected. If your company or profession has a conference I want to encourage you to go to feel connected with your trade or career. 2. We need each another. No one should work completely on their own. I am a solo therapist in my private practice, and I can feel all alone at times. It's important to know that we need others to support and encourage us through the good and bad t

One of the most lonely and isolating things someone can do is to keep their mental health disorder to themselves. The stigma and shame that are often associated with a disorder are often the reason for the silence. Psychologists, doctors, and counselors use a mental health disorder manual called the DSM 5 to diagnose and treat patients with mental health disorders. At the same time, longing to "let it out" can be so intense and so powerful that it provokes even more anxiety and fear. So, many people who suffer from a mental health disorders keep it to themselves. They can be pretty good at it too. They know how to put on a fake smile, act happy and talk about how good life is, all the while dying inside. As a therapist, I know the importance of why you should talk about your disorder. Talking to someone about your disorder can be very freeing and liberating. No, I'm not suggesting that you open your window and scream at the top of your lungs that you have a disorder to everyone who can hear.  Le

As a therapist, I often see and hear stories that would break anyone’s heart. Parent’s weeping over the condition of their child or the state of their family.  A mom sobbing over the fact that her child is depressed and miserable after suffering years of abuse. A dad riddled with guilt for failing to foresee that his own son would attempt suicide. A little seven-year-old boy saying that his life is over because he feels that he must choose sides in a bitter divorce... ...all stem from brokenness. As I talk about this I am struck with the question, “What does it mean to be broken?”  A simple search in a Thesaurus reveals definitions such as “run down”, “kaput”, “out of order”, “not working”, and “wrecked”. I don’t know about you, but when I come across a machine that I rely on for coffee, a restroom, or anything else that I need or want, and it’s “out of order” I’m not happy. Learn more about John Cordray at www.johncordray.com Smells Like Humans Like listening to funny friends discuss curious human behavior

There comes a time when we sit back and reflect on who we really are. Where we came from, how we got to this point in our lives, and where we're heading.  Thinking and reflecting about life happens a lot at funerals, weddings, and high school reunions.   A High School Reunion and 5 Reflections About Life What were you like in high school? I was reminded of this very question when I went to my wife's 25th high school reunion. You know the scenario, old friends catching up with each other while the spouses sit at a table bored out of their minds. Yeah, I was at that table. But, as I sat at the table watching old friends get reacquainted, I noticed something interesting that made me reflect on my own life. Reflections of our humanity, what makes us truly human, the cord that connects us all.  We all have a past, some we are grateful for, some we regret. Here are 5 Reflections on humanity:   1. We all have a story.  High school reunions are great places to put on a mask and pretend we hav