Solo Parent Society

Parenting alone is so hard. But when our kids are all different - with different temperaments, personalities, struggles, behavior traits — it is hard to know how to guide them effectively and, at the same time, how to be OUR best for them - uniquely and individually. Fortunately, we have a special guest with us today who knows a little something about the variety pack when it comes to family and kids.  If you are familiar with Christian music at all in some way or another, her incredible parenting skills have impacted you. Helen Smallbone is mother to Joel and Luke of For King and Country, and daughter Rebecca St. James. She hosts an incredible podcast on Access More called MUM LIFE Community; she has raised and homeschooled a total of 7 kids. For the detailed show notes, tips and links visit SoloParentSociety.com Receive a free SPS Welcome Toolkit with links to groups, info and a free book. Join our daily meditational devotional Download our free app - APPLE - ANDROID

Starting a new year can be a real mixed bag for single parents. On the one hand, it’s nice to kind of push the ‘reset’ button on a brand new year and to feel like you have somewhat of a clean slate. But, on the other hand, it’s hard to believe that things will be different.  New Year’s resolutions seem trite and overused. We all want to move forward and build a better life, but it isn’t easy without a clear vision or roadmap.  ?Fortunately for us today, we have a special guest to help us create a simple, clear vision and roadmap for a better year. Our guest is Michael Hyatt, founder, and chairman of Michael Hyatt & Company. He is also the author of several New York Times, Wall Street Journal, and USA Today bestselling books, including Living Forward, Your Best Year Ever, Free to Focus, and his newest book Win at Work & Succeed at Life. He lives in Franklin, TN, with his wife of 40+ years; he has five daughters and nine grandchildren. For the detailed show notes, tips and links, visity SoloPa

HAPPY NEW YEAR! We all want the new year to feel like a new page, a new chapter. Like we’re making progress and moving forward. But for some of us, the new year can feel discouraging because it’s hard to believe that things will be different this year. We can feel like we’re on a hamster wheel of progress. One step forward, two steps back, and it gets exhausting. Our experience day and day out, year and year out, seems to stay the same. But it turns out there are things that we can do to change our experience, and it has everything to do with vision, specifically our perspective. On today's podcast, we discuss tips to do that. For the detailed show notes, tips and links visit SoloParentSociety.com Receive a free SPS Welcome Toolkit with links to groups, info and a free book. Join our daily meditational devotional Download our free app - APPLE | ANDROID

So we’ve just made it past another Christmas, we’re headed right into a brand new year, and for many of us single parents, this final topic of Advent, PEACE, can be very far from something that we feel regarding the future. Especially living in the days that we’re living in right now today. So we are incredibly honored to have a guest that we quote with us all the time, and through her writing and speaking, she has had a lot to say about this topic. Our guest this week is Ann Voskamp. She is the author of five NY TIMES best-selling books, including ‘One Thousand Gifts’, which has sold over a million copies and been translated into more than 22 languages. Ann is Mom to seven, wife to a farmer and as Kim will be first to point out is Canadian. In this episode, we discuss how to find peace amidst loss and walking into the unknown, among many other things. For the detailed show notes, tips and links visit SoloParentSociety.com Receive a free SPS Welcome Toolkit with links to groups, info and a free book. Join our

Spoiler alert: You will never be able to listen to this song the same again. We have heard from so many Solos that this can be one of the most challenging times of the year. Christmas has always been something that we look forward to—especially being parents. But, being a single parent, holidays can open up so many wounds. As we look at Advent this month, our theme this week is Joy. In a season where so many solos feel distraught, not full of joy, we can’t help relate to that night in Bethlehem so long ago when love broke through in such an unexpected way.  The song we’re talking about is ‘Oh Holy Night’, and it too has an unexpected history that, we predict, will forever change the way you not only hear the song but will leave you with a renewed sense of wonder. We are joined this week by one of the humblest, passionate, and authentic pastors that we know. He’s also an author of a fantastic book called Soul Rest; of course, I’m talking about Curtis Zackery, who goes by CZ.  For the detailed show no

For many of us, Christmas has always been something that we look forward to—especially being parents. But being a single parent, after going through a divorce, never having been married, or after losing a spouse to death, holidays can open up wounds that we may never have even thought were there. So, we want to spend some time this month focusing on those wounds and trying to re-orient ourselves back to the meaning and intent of the season. To try to make it the most meaningful experience we can. As difficult as the seasons can be for us, they can be very confusing and challenging for kids, so how can we make the most of this Christmas season, both for ourselves and our kids. This month as we talk about holidays and Christmas, we take time to focus on Advent. As we know, it is broken into four traditions, Hope, Love, Joy, and Peace. ADVENT, by definition a time of ‘expectant waiting’ - which doesn’t sound fun - nobody likes to wait… But there can be hope, even found in waiting. So today, we focus on the secon

For many of us, Christmas has always been something that we look forward to—especially being parents. But being a single parent, after going through a divorce, never having been married, or after losing a spouse to death, holidays can open up wounds that we may never have even thought were there. So, we want to spend some time this month focusing on those wounds and trying to re-orient ourselves back to the meaning and intent of the season. To try to make it the most meaningful experience we can. As difficult as the seasons can be for us, they can be very confusing and challenging for kids, so how can we make the most of this Christmas season, both for ourselves and our kids. This month as we talk about holidays and Christmas, we take time to focus on Advent. As we know, it is broken into four traditions, Hope, Love, Joy, and Peace. ADVENT, by definition a time of ‘expectant waiting’ - which doesn’t sound fun - nobody likes to wait… But there can be hope, even found in waiting. So today, we focus on the first

Being a single parent seems that all we do is wait. Wait for child support checks, wait for lawyers to get back to us, wait for hurt to lose its crippling grip. We feel lonely and can't wait to feel normal again. Like it or not, it seems like life is a waiting game that we can’t wait to get past. We hear that good things ‘apparently’ come to those who wait - but what does that even mean? Most of us are beyond ready for things to not feel so broken. On this episode, we discuss - What’s worth waiting for. (Spoiler alert, this is not just waiting for a new mate.) For the detailed show notes, tips and links at SoloParentSociety.com To receive a free SPS Welcome Toolkit with links to groups, info and a free book Join our daily meditational devotional Download our free app - APPLE | ANDROID

As single parents, we have all encountered struggle. Some have had a spouse leave, some have experienced the unexpected death of our spouse, and some of us have been so surprised to be faced with the enormous weight of being pregnant and having a child with no partner. In every case that brings us to this 'Solo Parent Table', where we all can say we have struggled - alone.  Sometimes that struggle seems to define us in ways that are not healthy. ‘I am not enough’ and ‘I am just damaged goods’ are messages that reverberate in our heads. As a result, many of us feel lost and lose hope, even though we have faith in the God who redeems all things. The beautiful thing is that in the midst of some of the most challenging struggles, God not only redeems, but He refines us and can actually define our sense of worth, BECAUSE of the struggle. Darren Tyler is someone who, day to day, encounters people in serious struggle. He is a 20 year veteran in the music and entertainment industry who walked away from that car

Many of us struggle with our sense of self-worth. We all want our kids to grow up with confidence and a sense of Worth that perhaps we don’t even currently have. We know that you can't give what you don't have. So as we work on our own sense of worth - are there things we can do to help our kids discover their sense of worth? Chip Dodd, a regular contributor to SPS, bestselling author of books like “ Voice of the heart,” and counselor talks helping our kids uncover their own sense of Worth, even when we feel like we don’t have a good handle on it ourselves.  For the detailed show notes, tips and links visit SoloParentSociety.com To receive a free SPS Welcome Toolkit with links to groups, info and a free book. Join our daily meditational devotional Download our free app - APPLE | ANDROID

So many of us get confused when we talk about Worth, believing it is the same thing, or similar, to self-esteem. So many of us struggle with a sense of failure, feeling ‘less than’, feeling very damaged, and certainly our sense of Worth can feel like it’s taking an enormous hit. We are surrounded by messages of self-help and self-esteem with books and conferences on the steps to regain or find self-esteem. So what is the difference between self-esteem and a sense of Worth?  Chip Dodd, a regular contributor to SPS, bestselling author of books like “ Voice of the heart,” and counselor talks about the difference between self-esteem and a sense of Worth and provides steps to a healthy understanding of our Worth. For the detailed show notes, tips and links at SoloParentSociety.com Receive a free SPS Welcome Toolkit with links to groups, info and a free book. Join our daily meditational devotional Download our free app - APPLE | ANDROID

Social media is here to stay. While we can be grateful for the connection it creates to our memories and friends from the past, it can be the source of serious discontentment, comparing ourselves to others seemingly perfect intact families (especial with the upcoming holidays), others bodies, career, even our own highlight reels of the way things used to be. Comparison erodes our sense of self-worth. So what can we do to step out of the comparison trap? Today, we discuss what this looks like and some tips for moving in that direction.  For the detailed show notes, tips and links at SoloParentSociety.com Receive a free SPS Welcome Toolkit with links to groups, info and a free book. Join our daily meditational devotional Download our free app - APPLE | ANDROID

Christy Wright is a personal development expert, NY TIMES best-selling author, speaker to Fortune 500 companies, and she is also the child of a single mom. Christy shares that being raised by a single parent has shaped her in profound ways. Christy has seen that many single parents live with an undercurrent of guilt. When one parent carries the responsibility for the care of their child, they often feel the need to compensate for any potential harm or hardship because the other parent is less available or absent. This guilt is common, but Christy says she is who she is because she was raised by a single parent, not in spite of it, but because of it. She attributes all her success to being raised by a single parent.  Often, single parents don’t realize the resilience, strength, and fortitude that their kids are learning as they watch them push through the struggles of parenting alone. Studies show that facing challenges in childhood teaches kids how to overcome obstacles later in life. When kids are insul

No need to fear! When we say ‘Dance Almost Naked’, of course, we are talking about the scripture from 2 Samuel 6, where David strips down to almost nothing and dances before the Lord.  As single parents, we can be preoccupied with getting everything right. Overthinking, analyzing, being self-critical and making sure we don’t let any balls drop can weigh us down and squelch out joy. God calls us his kids, and the one thing we know about kids is there is a sense of abandon, innocence, and wonder inherent in all kids. Somewhere along the way, we lose that sense. And when we have been wounded we start to lose that beautiful, carefree spirit that, like the kids on the mount, just ran to Jesus, seemingly unaware of the gravity of who they were running to. Or like a king, David, so filled with Joy that the ark of the covenant was being returned to Jerusalem that he 'loses it' - strips down, out of his royal robes and dances it says, ‘with all his might’.  So, as we think of self-care - what would it look l

Parenting alone is so hard. Often we feel isolated and ‘out there on our own’. We know that God says that He is with us, but sometimes it just doesn’t feel that way.  Katie Haseltine is a spiritual director, a certified Enneagram and self-care coach, and author of “All the Things: A 30 Day Guide to Experiencing God’s Presence in the Prayer of Examen.” She was always looking for what was right, the correct theology, and figuring things out, while at the same time experiencing a lot of difficulty and suffering in her daily life. She was finding out that life wasn’t adding up the way she thought it would or how she had been taught. She struggled with finding peace and comfort in her relationship with God.  Katie began exploring her personal connection to God in ways that went beyond just “doing the right things” which is what she had focused on for most of her faith journey. As she started working with people, she found many who were burnt out on religion, who felt like a failure, and like they never h

As single parents, we have minimal time, and often the last thing we spend that time on are things that we use to prioritize.  God wants us to take care of ourselves physically, and that means more than just health. It is about priorities and balance. There are so many critical things at the top of our list of priorities that simple things like shaving our legs, eating well, or dressing well can move to the bottom of the list.   For who?  For what?  There are so many important things to do; if we're honest with ourselves… we often 'let ourselves go'.? Conversely, some of us may spend more time focusing on our body and appearance than while we were married.  Maybe hoping to catch the eye of a potential suitor? Either way, in this episode we are focusing on investing in ourselves, for the sake of ourselves… not for anybody else. (other than God… who already thinks we are pretty awesome!) For the detailed show notes, tips and links go to SoloParentSociety.com Receive a free SPS Welc

In general, we all know that the Bible talks a lot about forgiveness and our need to forgive. As Solo Parent Christians who have been hurt, this can be easier said than done. Is there more to the idea of forgiveness than just doing it because God says we should? Is it possible that there is a foundational mystery to the practice of forgiveness that unlocks our own potential, not only as Christians but also as individuals?  Many know Brian Hardin as the vision and voice of the Daily Audio Bible, with over 20 million downloads a year. He is an ordained minister, an accomplished record producer with more than 100 albums to his credit, a best-selling author - including his latest project, The OneYear Adventure With The God Of Your Story.  Not everyone knows that Brian himself spent time as a Solo dad raising his kids on his own. In today's episode, Brian walks us through Why Forgiveness? A Biblical Perspective. Detailed show notes, tips and links. For more on Brian and Daily Audio Bible Receive a free S

We regularly hear from single parents who have experienced abuse of some kind and sometimes from more than one perpetrator. The pain of trauma is so deep and life-altering, is it possible to forgive those who hurt us? Therapists Laurie and Bill Lokey share their perspectives on this significant and complex question. Laurie Lokey is a licensed counselor who has worked at Onsite Workshops for ten years and in private practice in middle Tennessee. Her husband, Bill Lokey served as the senior clinical director for Onsite Workshops supervising over seventy therapists throughout the United States. Bill shares that defining trauma is fraught with preconceptions. Some think of trauma as life-threatening events, and those events do create trauma in our brain as well as emotional pain, but trauma is broader. Bill says trauma involves emotional and physical pain as well as a sense of helplessness. Trauma sets us up to feel continually unsure of our safety and to be on high alert all the time. Our bodies are in a state o

Church was God’s idea for the wellbeing of his kids. It is a vital and important component in our spiritual lives. Unfortunately, though, sometimes some of us get hurt by people in the church or those in ministry. Much of the time, these hurts were unintended. Regardless, it is important for us to experience the freedom of forgiveness related to things that happen even from those in ministry.  Jake Smith, Jr., founder of Plumline, an organization focused on wholeness and growing healthy relationships joined the podcast to talk further about this very topic. As a former pastor and church planter he helped build thriving ministries but like many of us, he too has experienced his share of hurt and the journey of forgiveness as a result.  As someone who has been both a church member and a church leader, Jake has a perspective from both positions. Jake shares that hurt is the feeling when we have been harmed emotionally, spiritually, mentally, or physically. Harm results in feeling hurt. Another feeling

Forgiveness is a tough topic but an important one. Sometimes we feel entitled to hang on to unforgiveness and letting go seems like letting someone off the hook, but we are called to forgive and there are benefits. Releasing things and being proactive with forgiveness can help us move forward and heal.   This week, single mom, Amber, shares some of her journey to forgive even when she didn’t want to. Like many divorced solo parents, Amber got married expecting it to last forever. But after 17 years, her marriage hit a crisis that ended in separation. She longed to see her marriage saved, and over the course of a three years, she waited, fasted, prayed, and sought wise counsel. She did everything possible, including many things driven by control and codependency, to avoid divorce. Ultimately, though, her ex was never fully on board to work on the relationship so, after 21 years, her marriage ended. From a place of painful devastation, Amber found herself on the difficult journey of needing to forgiv