Unspoiled! A Song Of Ice And Fire

It's graduation day at the wall, and everyone's remembering the great times they had together. Everyone except Samwell Tarly. We talk wall times, new plans, and I break out a monumental number of predicitions. There's also a movie invite for anyone who loves haunted planes! Curious? That's why I'm being so obtuse! Crack open this pod-egg, and feast upon the flavor that is UNSPOILED.

Trial by combat! Good thing nothing can go wrong with this---or, maybe it's a travesty that ends with a good man dying? Either way, it's an excuse to talk about mideval armor in comedy, and what Tyrion's going to get up to now that he's free and clear.

Right back in like we left something! It's Chapter 39, where Eddard wakes up with a hell of a poppy milk hangover. We get deep into dream analysis, and then talk about where to draw the line between hitting your wife and having her assasinated. There's plenty of Robert Baratehon talk, and questions over if Circe Lannister is "frustrating to deal with" or maybe a little more than that. Let's all decide together, but only after we listen to UNSPOILED!

Hey All, sorry we missed intros and outros on this one, but check that audio quality! It's Tyrion at the Eirie, getting his sky cell on, until he talks his way into a trial by combat that's bound to end in travesty! Natasha empathizes with the little guy with a big mouth, while Brendan invents a ninja Lannister strike force to break Tyrion out of his prison. We have a good long discussion on food in westeros (Where are the potatoes? What tastes better, ice or fire?) and blogtalk turns to accusations of colonialism.

Bran times! We get scared it's going to be boring, but then it's exciting! So exciting! We Starks, Theon Greyjoy, podcast geekery, if women can use the internet, and wolf violence!

We go back to the Dothraki sea to check on our two favorite Targaryans, and find them doing the same old dance. Will these two crazy kids ever learn to get along? Will Viceryes ever stop being the dumbest sack of rocks ever commited to the page? These questions! Plus! A Contest! and the plans for Capcom vs Game of Thrones. It's another day, and another UNSPOILED!

Littlefinger brings Eddard straight to some clues, and then Jamie shows him what it means to mess with the Lannisters. We talk prostituion, retribution, and evolution, as this chapter brings up some big questions, while only offering a few small answers! Everybody retreat into your conspiracy theorist bomb shelter, because it's time for a near fatal dose of UNSPOILED!

What is with these mountians!? Catelyn seems to have lead us into the worst part of Westeros so far, the Vale! We continue our chapter by chapter dissection (it's a loving dissection) of George RR Martin's Game of Thrones. We're about halfway through the book, and things are heating up! In this chapter, there's some debate about the technique of writing deliberatly sloggy prose to wear out the reader, an extended (and probably incorrect) Twilight zone analogy, more Roman history, and lots of Lysa Arryn talk. Hoo boy this chapter is just chock full of crazy. Let's not stand on ceremony, let's get UNSPOILED!

Turn in your badge and gun Ned! You're a loose cannon! You're off the case, and if I catch you pursuing it, I'll have you behind a desk until retirement! That's how this chapter would read if it was a cop drama, and not game of thrones-- oh, and I was the author, and it was at my website. Join us, as we discuss Ned's next moves, make assaination predictions, and premier our pitch for "Dothraki Abby". Also look out for the crappy intro-- I had to do some emergency recording on an Amtrak train, so I think you can catch some stock tips in the background. The rest of the Ep sounds great though! So dig into that fresh pot of UNSPOILED!

Try to catch cats, you end up catching two fat guys hatching a plot. That's the saying right? Something like that? It's Arya, she's slick as a shadow, but she's not ready for royalty, dragon skulls, and assassination plots all in one day. Brendan makes a breakthrough (maybe?) with the help of a 5th grade science education, and Natasha tries not to reveal any secrets!

What's been going on with Catelyn and Tyrion this whole time? Nothing that I predicted. The hills have eyes, and the hunters are now the hunted...or something? Everything goes all to hell, and Tyrion's got a quick wit, a joke, and a plan to turn this situation to his advantage. This is one of my favorites, and it's UNSPOILED!

Flower knights, ridey mountains, hounds, and kingslayers! It's the end of the tournement. It's time for chaos, investigations, and drinking beer with the king. What didn't happen this chapter? Kick your Monday off Unspoiled style!

It's time for a tournament-- forget your precious modern sports, people barely die doing those. Lets do this the Westeros way, everyone put on your fanciest armor and try to not quite kill each other! Sansa's carried away by the spectical, gets to go to the afterparty, and then even gets some private time with THE Sandor Clegane. Brendan finds a new favorite charecter, Natasha tries to decipher the Hound, and we engage in some sports betting. It's all excitement, it's all UNSPOILED!

A short one! Catelyn confronts Tyrion on her way back to Winterfell. What? This wasn't supposed to happen! What's going to happen? Will two headed bird omens really be the problem? Is that what George RR Martin had in mind? There's a pile of predictions on this weeks UNSPOILED!

Things are getting hot in King's Landing, and it's getting a little silly in the Unspoiled studio. We dig deep into consipracy theories, geneology, and sex-traps. This mystery has Brendan questioning everything, and Natasha may not be able to hold in her incredulity. Sure, like you have it all figured out! Dig in deep, and let it break your beautiful brain, in this episode of UNSPOILED!

We're back up to the wall with Jon! A new recruit brings out the worst in some, and the best in others, as Jon finally adapts to life on the wall. Harrowing true tales of gym teachers are discussed, as well as questions about homosexuality in Westeros. We dig in for more shenanigans with this episode of UNSPOILED!

Trust no one! Intruige, conspiracy, honeyed milk! They're all going down smooth in Kings Landing. Who killed Jon Arryn? The Queen? The Grand Maester? Littlefinger? Bad clams? We play our own version of Clue. Brendan makes wild guesses, tries to sing the x-files theme song, and gives his top three murder suspects. Natasha relishes in his foolishness. We also address some wider questions-- Is this a good book? is it trashy? Is George RR Martin a good writer? Is it even fair to reveiw a book chapter by chapter? Answers, to only a few of those questions, and some silliness await you in this ep of UNSPOILED!

Bran has a new life! Tyrion returns to winterfell! Brendan and Natasha are digging more into age, authorial intent, and tiny hounds the size of spiders. It's all in the new UNSPOILED!

It's right into the thick of it in this chapter! Brendan's not going to take another Daenyris chapter lying down, and he's fired up and ready for all comers. We talk magical gonnerhea, boner killing, and appropriate headware. We also give some serious thought to Vicerys being developmentally disabled. It's a little extra saucy, it's UNSPOILED!

It's tough growing up in Westeros, especially when your sister is fitting in, but your only friend has been chopped in half by the royal guard. We go deep in this chapter, and talk Arya, Ned, Catelyn, reality TV, Skrillex, Reggaeton, genetic aberrations, and spirit animals. Don't sleep on this late night episode of UNSPOILED!