How To Avoid Murder And Other Awkward Situations

Happy Halloween!    It's raw footage with no edits, a tribute to the poorly planned crimes of Richard Ramirez and a computer breakdown that didn't allow us to access a previously recorded episode! But don't worry, we're drinking enough to ease that pain. Speaking of pain, Ramirez, known as the Night Stalker in some circles, and as a Master Paladin of Hearthstone in others, is a fascinating subject. Perfect for Halloween. And idea for Christmas or Thanksgiving. Really any occasion where rape and murder are not brought up nearly enough.    So, please, enjoy!Or don't. Either way we will be back for more you filthy animals. 

In this months episode we discuss the crimes committed by Craig Price, otherwise known as the Warwick Slasher. He viciously murdered four people, all of them his neighbors, before he was 16. And, due to the laws in Rhode Island, he is going to be released from prison in the next few years.  We also discuss the somewhat more important topic of the moral implications of John Wicks killing spree, Dave's new love of vodka, Laura's dirty Irish genes, and try to edit out twenty five minutes of our dog being an asshole.    It is a return to greatness and we are happy to talk to you earholes once again. 

In this episode we look at the cannibalistic murder committed by Antron Singleton AKA Big Lurch. We're not sure if eating someone alive is cultural appropriation but it does at least seem like something that should be happening in the death metal community, not hip hop. So we check our privilege and look at the brutal 2002 murder by then up and coming rapper Big Lurch.  Dave makes many horrible hip-hop puns and discusses his junior high "jew-fro". He also begins our new de-advertising campaign where he verbally assaults businesses that displease him. And Laura crushes him ever so slightly throughout the episode. We reach out to our viewers for PCP stories and/or people that may be holding for our final July episode. 

  In this episode we look at at the murder spree of Chai Vang and whether or not it was racially motivated- or if that even matters. Chai Vang took it upon himself to literally hunt and murder an entire hunting party in the deeps woods of Wisconsin. We provide an in depth look at the actual act is focused on, a series of depraved actions that were largely overlooked in the coverage of this case.    Dave also admits to yet another desire to kill people from his past, Laura refuses to discuss "Say Anything" with Dave ever again, and we somehow turn our lighthearted podcast about forcible violent deaths into a political discussion about race and cultures. Dave also manages to mispronounce almost every single possible thing in this episode and accuses Laura of "Stepping on his toes". It's a dark journey into murder and marriage..enjoy!

To be fair Shiela Eddy isn't the only person that participated in the murder of her 16 year old friend Skylar Neese. But she is the Regina George archetype taken to its logical conclusion. She was the queen bee and when she got mildly irritated with a member of her hive she plotted and orchestrated an almost perfect crime. Her only flaw was not understanding that everybody isn't a sociopath. Her accomplice had...a lot of feelings. And these feelings caused a crime that would have never been discovered to unravel.  This episode we didn't find a good way to avoid what happened, other than locking yourself in your room and not socializing with peers for the first thirty years of your life. Which, honestly, doesn't sound that bad in retrospect. We look at the complexities and terror of teenage girls. Dave gets yelled at, a little, by Laura. "Birthday Weekends" are discussed and agreed to be grounds for justifiable homicide. And Laura wants a goat skull. All this and more on June's final episode....

Ever wonder about things that go bump in the night? Well, in this episode we give you the worse case scenario. Lock your doors and load your guns after listening to this one.  Dave was extremely disturbed as he learned of the details of LaPlante's later crime. The media portrayal of him has more or less focused on the salacious details of his stalking of a teenage girl. We explore this but focus on the more serious of his crimes. It is absolutely horrific.  Dave had to watch Fargo (his favorite romantic comedy) several times after recording this just to snap out of the funk.  This episode reminds us that life is horror and needs no competition from fiction.   

We dive face first into a bourbon filled pool in order to celebrate Mother's day. Briefly covering some of our personal favorite murderous moms, or murdered moms, the conversation slips into how quickly somebody would take advantage of Britney Spears corpse. If you're listening Britney....Happy Mother's day!  This is our first "bonus" episode where we more or less free form through a topic, without really focusing on one person or incident.  The drink of choice was Bulleit Bourbon 10 year (small batch) with some bitters. We also stole a joke from Tony Zaret. And gave him credit. So we just sort of borrowed it, if anyone asks.  We cover Ed Kemper, Ed Gein, Lizzy Borden, Susan Smith, Casey Anthony, and more. Not much more though.   

Elliot Rodger somehow managed to be raised by a Hollywood producer in southern California and not get laid. This was a point of contention for him, as well as confusion. Despite having good parents, and every privilege one could imagine, he was unable to get it done with the ladies. So, naturally, he took to the internet for help. He found solace with creeps (even for the internet) in the involuntary celibate (Incel) community. He was off putting, filled with rage, and quite literally a pyschopath. However, he was a very strong World of Warcraft Player.    We discuss the path that led to the eventual massacre, Laura's extremely low standards, the fact that Jurassic Park may have prevented Dave from getting laid for a long time- and most importantly...it gets better nerds. Please. It gets better. You will get laid. Which may or may not be as rewarding as watching Jurassic Park. 

Erika had it all; A personality disorder, a meathead husband, tons of Hooters merchandise, and her very own scrap-booking business. She was living the American Dream. The wrong king of America, but a dream none the less. But, sadly, it wasn't enough of a thrill to just be a terrible person. She and her husband had to go and kill a few other people. They also got really questionable tattoos. Bad choices abound in this episode, as we explore the dark side of the classiest place on Earth: Ocean City Maryland. 

Richard "Dicky" Speck lived the life Forest Gump should have. In fact, he probably hated that movie. But, he hated everything except alcoholics with peg legs and trains. He managed to fail his way through life, and rightfully so. Speck was tiny, poor, angry, and an alcoholic.  Nothing he did seemed to work out and one fateful night he enveloped a house of student nurses in his black cloud. He didn't meet any presidents, earn any medals, or travel into space (that happened in the book). Speck's lasting contribution to this world was to inspire better safety measures on college campuses. And this podcast. Incidentally it is likely that both he and Forest Gump died from complications related to HIV. A lot of people died at his hands. And most of those people could have avoided it happening. Richard Speck shows the tragedy of trust and hopefully listening will impact you to remind yourself and everyone you love to kill tiny violent men whenever you get the chance. Also we learn that one of the hosts steals s

Elyse Pahler is not a household name. Her case is synonymous with a lawsuit her parents filed against legendary metal band Slayer. The details, the horrible, worse than you can imagine details, have been lost over time. We focus on the forgotten and overlooked actions of the teenage Satan worshiping wannabees who murdered her, and most importantly, on the life she could of lived. Also we are still technically a comedy show. Really. All though this episode is darker than most. Most of our other murder podcasts are just silly. God we are horrible people.   

Stephen Grant had it all. He was insecure, unintelligent, unmotivated, bitter, jealous, full of rage, a human douche bag and comically inept at crime. A walking talking embodiment of the bad choices a woman can make in choosing a companion. We explore the only significant thing to happen to him in his life, albeit a horrible one. This episode is a subtle nudge to all women to maybe date people that don't crash funerals. 

In this episode we try and cleanse our souls but just get caught up in a web of sex and murder. So no complaints on our end.  We look at the sordid tale of Pastor David Love and his long term affair with a member of his congregation. This leads to murder, multiple prison sentences, and an amazing eulogy that we play at the end of the broadcast. When it comes to true depravity its hard to find a better inspiration than the bible. Or Laura. 

This episode starts out light and gets really dark about twenty minutes in. A tale of a mommy blogger and all around horrible person, we explore the twisted tale of Lacey Spears and her victim.  Because sometimes munchausen syndrome by proxy takes too long and you just need to kill a kid. 

We dive deep into the events of the 1993 thrill killing in Palatine Illinois. While some have looked at this as a robbery gone bad we examine the history and aftermath of the driving force behind this; James Degorski.    Towards the end Laura shares a story that begins like a porno/horror movie and we discuss her sordid past. 

A look at the life, times, and many murders of Todd Kohlhepp. Also an in-depth look at why not to work at Waffle House.