No More Whoppers

  It sure is our 122nd episode! This week, the two things Ray hates to hear; Alex revisits early NoMoWo; a visit from Australia’s finest; surviving health and safety training; heading home for the holidays; Serial is good but not the best thing ever; improv out of nowhere; Random Acts of Pasta Guy revisited; video game talk (your Yakuzas, your Streets Fighter, etc.), and the world-threatening Amiibo shortage! This podcast is for loading and unloading only.

Our 21st palindrome! This week, Alex continues eating pizza on mic; Ray enrolls openly; Alex meets his girlfriend’s folks over a lovely lunch; November wrap-up and how we Thanksgave; holiday game purchases; the wonders of credit cards; planning the final issue of SCHLUMP; Neverending Generosity Bowl; Pardcast-a-thon and MST3K’s Turkey Day 2014 recaps; AlexTron goes rogue; Bar Talk the Mind-Taker; the names of popular wrestlers; car-selling Fanf; Alex lays down, recounts a vivid nightmare, gets loopy; a Kentia Hall postmortem; TV talk, and 3DO DOOM! Ray’s murder will eventually be investigated by Sarah Koenig.

We've collected our 120th episode and Yoshi's on the roof! This week, Alex's pizza reality tour; Ray gets Smashed; our new segment, Drink Food New Thing; the brief lives of Japanese milks; no thanks, Sunkus; the fetid FedEx and big ups to UPS; Alex reconsiders his pricing system; SoftBank continues to fail; the highs and lows of Fantasy Life, and assertive Fanf! Absence of evidence is not evidence of this podcast.

  Our 119th Muppisode! This week, more evidence linking Alex with Stanley Tucci; Ray goes Interstellar; an unexpected gift from a posh Persian; Ray’s 2000 inch TV; Alex modernizes his telephone device; raging at SoftBank’s customer “service”; drunk idiots crash the bar; rude gamers; Fanf, and yet another technical foul-up! If you can’t handle this podcast at its worst, you don’t deserve it at its best.

  Fall and ebola are in the air! CRITICAL*HIT is up and running, with stories of friends, fries, and Final Fantasy; we discuss Halloweens past and present; Alex’s accidental blood pact; slow-motion diving into the Bayonetta bilogy; Fantasy Life as FFXI methadone; Ray dips into Hi-sCoool! SeHa Girls; obsessing over the Age of Ultron trailer; the return of Shadowlaw and a visit to the lackluster Orca d’Oro; dutiful donors, and the announcement of our Age of Altron t-shirt contest! This podcast can’t be helped.

S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-Spooky Sundays! Alex is a whirlwind of nerves as he prepares for the bar’s pre-open; a new Information Pad with new possibilities; another typhoon threatens Japan; popular butt bands; the boys discuss weddings (and a funeral); no Halloween plans to speak of; video games… to REDUCE stress?!; and Fan Fun, featuring our now segment “Fame or Gate?”! This podcast needs your help to transfer a lot of money overseas!

  Sweet 116! Alex’s hard drive is in a better place now; Ray is the target of road rage; the great American apartment search continues; portable vs. at-home Smashing; a fun-filled visit from two Gold Subscribers; picking up a fryer on the cheap; the hunt for bread; MST3K in Japan; the three B’s and avoiding confrontation at a barbecue; thanks, typhoon!; sandbagging; an exploration of various Kongs; an Aussie shout-out; frames aplenty; a very Vancouver thank-you, and a brief eulogy for Mathew Klickstein’s career! See our ad in Juggs!

We’re Back! Two Jackasses’ Story. Ray upgrades his Information-Phone and home entertainment unit; an exploration of Charles E. Cheese and survival horror; Critical Hit draws nearer to its Grand Opening; dealing with the Japanese “Home Center”; the fall of Shadowlaw; a trip to Tokyo Disney and the 8-4 pre-TGS shindig; disappointment at Luida’s Tavern and Artnia; fiscal practices of Japan’s well-to-do, and supercharged Fanf! This podcast is waiting for you in the hot tub.

This week, Ray begins the search for a new domicile; corrections from last week’s episode; welcome to the shitheap that is the NHK; prepping pub paint and Japan’s insistence on the fax; we love #1, and the Fan Fun theme makes a triumphant return! Vote for us in the 31st Annual Battle Creek Podcast Awards!

Take a number! This week, first impressions of the SlimeStation 4 and other game news; summer scorch winds down; Alex’s continuing visa struggle; more Japanese banking in(s)anity; #nomorewhoppers; Ray gives TMNT two shells down; too many Blade Runner references; Alex waits anxiously for GotG’s Japanese premiere; bar renovation begins and drinking with salarymen; hanging out with a NoMoWo fan at Genesis; Microsoft’s flaccid Japanese Xbox One marketing; brick and mortar nostalgia; high-tech POS equipment, and forceful Fan Fun! Don’t cry for us, we’re already dead.

Halfway to 224! T-shirt sales are through the roof!; bugging Brad’s rad dad Tad; beard trimmer rebirth; the northward-bound package; Are You Being Severed; the steady decline of the Simpsons; too cool for media; podcasts in Japan; H&S For Men Scalp EX; an evening in a Japanese love hotel; Alex in hot water; Fanf, featuring some generous donors, and the new mini-segment MAXIMUM ‘TUDE! This podcast is a work of fiction.

Our eleventy-first episode! This week, we’re happy to announce that our shirt is selling like T-cakes!; Ray expands his Super Game Boy collection; retro console maintenance; a brief history of Miracle Warriors; welcome to Abobo’s; will podcast for food; Marvel Cinematic Universe talk; dealing with shitty events; touring America with Immigrant Alex; getting back into the world of fantasy; Alex demands coupons, misunderstands groupons; donor thanks; drunk Home Alone, and enjoy our famous pre-post post-show! Get this podcast FREE with any purchase of $250 or more at participating Dollar Generals!

This podcast gives 110%! This week, the contents of quiche; Ray breaks barriers at Six Flags; Alex refuses Tokyo Disneyland; the commercialization of Square-Enix brands; Critical Hit news and visa panic; Costco from a distance; Alex wants to cosplay several times; John Grisham presents Facebook lickers, and a sartorial offer exclusive to listeners! Professional podcasters on closed course.

More of this?! This time we talk commercial props; more on corporate transparency; Nintendo Japan’s MK8 promo is rose gold bullshit; Pokemonotony; MS-DOS what 32Xn’t; taking whiners in stride; kicking back at the KKB; The Nagoya Skip; the perils of Beatlemania; the local meat market and an expensive sale in #Japan; Square-Enix been served; Zelda Muslim; donor thanks in stereo, and new videogaimz! This podcast was inspired by actual events.

Our 108th episode of destiny! This week, Dinner Food Copy; Pine SOL; sweating through your suit and summer vs. winter; Alex’s birthday haul; dispelling the myths of blood type in this week’s #Japan; Tako Talk, and insuring our bones and teeth! If you don’t listen to this podcast today, don’t bother coming in on Monday!

Lucky 107! In this outing, Table Tool Time Episode 001; trying to open a business account in this week’s #Japan; covert advertising in the face of legal pressure; enjoy the free FFXIV weekend by not playing; incredulous foreigners in Japanese advertising; Alex signs on to promote Ireland; the rules of kegs; Fanf rises like a Phoenixph; ranking our pros and cons; logo theft cont’d, and Alex abuses Ray with drop modulation! This podcast will reach the Kuiper Belt in approximately nine years.

Welcome back to the stage of history! This week, retro game shopping, price-gouging Japanese t-shirts; hauling ass through Shovel Knight; summer weddings; logo thievery; multiple viewings; Alex gets Gold Carded; this week in #Japan (or, “It can’t be helped, please understand”); bar scrubdown and nauseating discoveries, and listening in on a child prodigy! This podcast includes scenes too outrageous for theaters!

We’re sweating our butts off! This week, No More Mondays Episode 001; bar news and the financial Hokey-Pokey; an exodus to Genesis; I think we just found Ray’s impressions of Trans4mers; Alex’s tips for drinking at the movies; Game Talk! (Mega Mans, Shovel Knight, Mario Kart 8, Dragon Quest X); the decline of shock-jock shit-heel radio; clumsily bilingual Fan Fun; the brackish pit of internet hyperbole, and we try our luck as Expendables! Trade in this podcast anywhere for $0.35 store credit!

We put the “sad” in “back in the saddle”! This week, Alex’s positive reaffirmations; Critical Filth; the burger heirarchy; adventures in Osaka featuring Daniel Feit and Matt Bloch; Ray’s adventure at TooManyGames 2014; the joy and brutality of Shovel Knight; rolling our Rs; words Alex thinks people want to hear him say; the surprising consequences of self immolation; a savory, full-bodied Fanf, and we summarize last episode’s lost content! Note: the dev team IS AWARE of the Alex glitch and a patch is forthcoming.

Surprise! We thought it lost, but that’s only half true. Apologies for the short episode this week, try not to get lost as our technical foul-up creates a mystifying web of conversation! You can best enjoy this podcast by writing your own damn description.