Expert Advice From Helpmesara

Sara Dimerman in conversation with J.M. Kearns. Over the course of this episode you will learn more about: How our "How can I be your lover when I'm too busy being your mother?" book came to be The Mother Syndrome and how big of a problem it is the connection with feeling and acting like a mother to one's partner and the lack of intimacy an overview of our book and what one will learn from reading it How a couple can implement our step by step plan what to do if one partner is not on board  

Sara Dimerman in conversation with Betty Cornelius. Over the course of this episode you will learn more about: What is a kinship family? How common is it that children are being raised by their grandparents? What is CANGRANDS? How does CANGRANDS reaches out to and helps grandparents. How and why are grandchildren typically raised by their grandparents? What is different about raising a grandchild compared to raising a child of ones own? What special requirements need to be in place? What if the grandparents don't have the resources to provide for their grandchildren? How does raising ones grandchildren typically affect the dynamics How are grandchildren typically affected - both positively and not as positively by being raised in a kinship family? CANGRANDS Hearts & Hands Quilt project How the rate of kinship families compares between Canada, the USA and other countries. How kinship families from around the world can connect with one another.  

Sara Dimerman in conversation with Liana Lowenstein. Over the course of this episode you will learn more about: What are some of the more common loss experiences for young children? Less common? Do young children grieve? What are some of the different ways in which children cope with loss? What factors determine how well or poorly child deals with loss? What are some of the warning signs that a child is not coping well How should we, as parents, help our child deal with loss? what should we be careful of doing or saying when our children are dealing with loss? What if we are coping with the same loss? should we hide our pain from our children? why or why not? what about if children are not showing any difficulty after a loss? might it still be beneficial to talk or receive therapy from a professional? What are some resources for children coping with loss? Books recommended for parents and children?  

Sara Dimerman In conversation with Rick Kelly. Over the course of this episode you will learn more about: What restorative/restorative justice means? How long the restorative justice model has been used and how it evolved? Other options for dealing with bullying issues How the restorative justice model works Who facilitates this process in schools The benefits of being with the right facilitator in a safe, supportive environment The risks of being with a facilitator who is not trained/certified How parents can familiarize themselves with the model being used in their children’s school in relation to bullying How teachers and administrators can encourage the restorative justice model as an intervention and form of prevention  

Sara Dimerman in conversation with Barbara Lebo. Over the course of this episode you will learn more about: Possible causes of autism Signs to look for in recognizing that your child may be autistic The roller coaster of emotions when raising a special needs child The impact that raising an autistic child has on the family Treatment options when caring for an autistic child How to advocate for your autistic child at school What to consider regarding school placement – mainstream or a specially contained classroom How  treatment programs can be integrated into the school/educational system Practical strategies that can make a difference – at home and school Resources and supports for parents and children Related links: An Unexpected Life: A Mother and Son's Story of Love, Determination, Autism, and Art  

Sara Dimerman in conversation with Janet Nezon. Over the course of this episode you will learn more about: What a "healthy eater" means At what age children become more discerning in regards to taste and texture of food Whether children's tastes and eating behaviour change as they grow Tips for parents on guiding their children towards healthy eating habits What and who the most important influencers on a child's eating behaviour are Whether its okay for children to skip meals, eat "junk" food and not eat the vegetables on their plate Tips on how to eliminate meal time power struggles eg getting children to try new foods and refusing what has already been prepared What a "picky eater" means and how to deal with one Working as a family towards healthy eating behaviour  

Sara Dimerman in conversation with Kate Davidson and Carol Y. Barber. Over the course of this episode you will learn more about: How to identify signs that your child may be more distractible, inattentive or hyperactive when compared to the average child his/her age. Reasons why your child may be distractible, inattentive or hyperactive. What steps to take in order to have your child assessed and by whom. Why a formal assessment may be key to getting your child the help he/she needs The tests that may be used to assess your child. Treatment approaches to dealing with children who are distractible, inattentive or hyperactive. How to advocate on your child's behalf at school and outside of school Dos and don'ts when dealing with a child who is distractible, inattentive or hyperactive. What resources and supports are available to you and your child.  

Sara Dimerman in conversation with Dr. Karen Leitner. Over the course of this episode you will learn more about: What changes to expect in behaviour and attitude from your 12-18 year old. The most powerful influences on your tween/teen during this stage of life. What you can do to keep your adolescent connected to your family. Setting limits and what to do when your child goes against them. What to expect and how to respond if your child is using drugs, alcohol or engaged in sexual behaviour. How to promote healthy self esteem in your tween/teen. How to detect the early stages of an unhealthy relationship with food or body image and what you can do about it. How to detect self injurious behaviour such as cutting and what you can do about it. How to detect depression or other mental health issues in your child and what to do about it.  

Sara Dimerman in conversation with Dr. Debby Zweig. Over the course of this episode you will learn more about: How to identify signs that your child may be more anxious than an average child his/her age What steps to take in order to have him/her assessed and by whom The different kinds of anxiety disorders e.g. phobia, separation anxiety, generalized anxiety disorder and what this all means Different treatment approaches to dealing with anxiety in children Your emotional reaction to learning that your child has an anxiety disorder How to advocate on your child's behalf at school and outside of school Dos and don'ts when dealing with an anxious child What resources and supports are available to you and your child  

Sara Dimerman in conversation with Deborah Moskovitch. Over the course of this episode you will learn more about: The normal range of mixed emotion you will experience after the separation. The most common mistakes that parents unintentionally make with their children after the separation. The most important factors to keep in mind in order for your children to be least affected by the changes to your family. The best ways to respond to your children's most common questions such as "will daddy ever come live with us again?" and "do you still love mommy?" How to cope with the changes to your social life: what's there to do when you're feeling lonely on a Saturday night. The domino effect: how to deal with friends and family who are feeling the impact of the changes too. When, where and how to introduce your children to a new partner. Resources and supports available to you.  

Sara Dimerman in conversation with Dr. Helena Zajdeman. Over the course of this episode you will learn more about: How to identify signs that your child may have a learning difficulty. What steps to take in order to have him/her assessed and by whom. Why a formal assessment may be key to getting your child the help he/she needs. The standardized tests that may be used to assess your child. Whether your child may be stigmatized as a result of being diagnosed Learning Disabled. Your emotional reaction to learning that your child has a learning difficulty. How to advocate on your child's behalf at school. What resources and supports are available to you and your child.  

Sara Dimerman in conversation with Dr. Nicky Cohen. Over the course of this episode you will learn more about: How to identify signs that your infant, toddler or preschooler may be manifesting more sleep related difficulties than the average child his/her age. Reasons why your child may be having sleep problems. Steps to take when dealing with a variety of sleep related issues such as: a child who refuses to fall asleep on his/her own a child who wakes at night and calls out to you a child who is experiencing daytime sleep difficulties a child who may be waking up earlier than the norm a child who is experiencing sleep terrors or nightmares The pros and cons of the family bed. What is sleep training? The pros and cons of sleep training. Dos and don'ts when dealing with sleep related difficulties. What resources and supports are available to you.  

Sara Dimerman in conversation with Rhona Feldt-Stein. Over the course of this episode you will learn more about: What is a developmental delay. What are the warning signs of a developmental delay. Types of developmental delays and the areas/skills the child may experience difficulties with (e.g. self-care, play, sensorimotor, fine and/or gross motor, cognitive, social skills). Possible reasons why your child may be developmentally delayed. How a developmental delay is identified Why a formal assessment may be key to getting your child the help he/she needs What are early intervention services and why is early intervention important. The OT (Occupational Therapy) assessment(s) that may be used to assess your child. OT (Occupational Therapy) treatment approaches to addressing the areas of difficulty in children with a developmental delay. Your emotional reaction to learning that your child has a developmental delay. How to advocate on your child's behalf at school/daycare and in the community. Dos and don'ts w

Sara Dimerman in conversation with Lana Feinstein. Over the course of this episode you will learn more about: What defines a normal parent Whether or not "normal" is all that its cracked up to be What thoughts, feelings and behaviours you share in common with others What percentage of parents feel bad (guilty) when they're mad and what you can do if you're one of them What percentage of parents tell their children "I'll be there in a minute" but really take ten or more and whether or not this is such a bad thing How many parents feel that they are slaves to their children and unappreciated. What you can do if you're one of them and want to turn things around. How many parents feel judged by others and if you're one of them, what you can say and do when you feel this way. What percentage of parents struggle to find time for their children, other adults and themselves and if you're one of them, how to balance things out. How many parents have a hard time deciding where to draw the line between being protective

Sara Dimerman in conversation with Lana Feinstein. Over the course of this episode you will learn more about: Why children misbehave. The many influences on our children and how to combat them. Who has the most power and influence on our children. How individual temperament, personality and genetics play a role in "bad" behaviour and whether this can be changed. Why children who are demanding, stubborn and strong willed may be better off in the long run than obedient, passive children. Why using the word "bad" is no good. How a parent's self fulfilling prophecy can lead to positive or negative behaviour. The difference between praise and encouragement and which works best. How even negative role models can provide learning opportunities to develop positive behaviour. How to build character (strong morals and values) in your children and your family. How to cope with some of the more common behavioural concerns e.g. not getting up for school or going to bed on time, not telling the truth, homework hassles, br

Sara Dimerman in conversation with Rozanne Israel. Over the course of this episode you will learn more about: How to identify signs that your child may be speech/language delayed compared to the average child his/her age. Reasons why your child may be experiencing speech/language difficulties. What's the difference between a speech versus a language concern. What steps to take in order to have your child assessed and by whom Why a formal assessment may be key to getting your child the help he/she needs The tests that may be used to assess your child Various types of speech/language delays or difficulties e.g. stuttering, voice disorders, receptive language delay, expressive language delay, phonological delay, articulation difficulty, motor speech disorder Treatment approaches to dealing with speech/language delays or difficulties in children. Your emotional reaction to learning that your child has a speech/language delay or difficulty. How to advocate on your child's behalf at school and outside of school Do

Hello, I am wanting to move out of my own house lately or buy a shed for my daughter to live in. She never has a polite tone towards me, is always arguing with absolutely everything, doesn't seem to care about anyone but herself. This is extremely difficult for her older aspergers sister and younger brother. I understand where she is coming from but she doesn't even try to change. I am at my wits end so to speak. Please help, I know she needs to feel important and she is special but doesn't think so because her siblings are more needy and take more time away from her. It is only me here to try to give everyone a fair share of myself. Eeeeeek! Thanks for anything you can help me out with. I have no supports, can't seem to find and/or keep any and no family to speak of. I am trying everything! Signed, Feeling Helpless

Hi Sara, I am a 25 year old mother of a 4 year old little girl. I am running out of ideas on how to discipline her properly and have her understand she has to listen or else there are consequences. I have tried time out in the corner and her room, taking things she enjoys away, quiet time etc. She is very bad because I let her get away with things for too long and now I feel its too late. I also have trouble with sticking to disciplinary actions that I am trying to enforce and I give in way too much! She says bad words at day care and hits and yells and also has been saying "I hate you" or "I dont love you!" to people when she doesn't get her way. I explained, as did her daycare, that these things she says are unacceptable and hurtful to people around us. People we do in fact love and care greatly for. I just dont know what else to do. I am panicking because she is going to start pre-school next year and I want her attitude fixed, but I want to do it right. Can you give me any ideas or pointers?

Recently my daughter wanted to have a sleepover with a few friends. Both of the friends she wanted to have over had iPhones, iPads and cell phones. We dont feel our daughter has any need for this as of yet. We have, in the past, found that these friends bring these devices and then text other kids instead of engaging with friends often leaving each other out. I'm not sure if its ok to ask kids to leave their cell phones and iPads at home or check them at the door. I have spoken to their parents to ask how they feel, but they dont seem to think there is any reason for concern. Please help, I need some advice.

Hi Sara, I am a first generation Canadian Born Chinese and my wife had immigrated to Canada and has Canadian Citizenship. We both live in Vancouver, BC and have two kids.My first child is about to start Kindergarten and my second child is still in preschool. I want my kids to speak more English at home so that they can do better in school but my wife disagrees and wants them to speak more Chinese at home.From my past experience, when I was elementary school, I had problems with English grammar. My teachers said to my parents that I should speak more English at home to improve my English skills to do well in school and since then my parents have been speaking English at home.My wife is accusing me of killing our cultural identity saying that I'm teaching our kids to forget their mother tongue. Now I'm in a flood basement scenario, help!