Rhett Smith Podcast

About 15 years ago as I was reading through the Bible a specific passage jumped out at me and forever changed my life. I remember the moment 15 years ago...that's how powerful this simple little verse was. The verse read: "From the wilderness of Sin the whole congregation of the Israelites journeyed by stages, as the Lord commanded." -- Exodus 17:1 I was captivated by this idea that God journeyed his people...the whole congregation...the whole community that is...out of the desert wilderness. But he didn't do it in one fell swoop, but literally, stage by stage. In fact, we know that the journey which should have taken only about 13 days into the Promised Land, actually took 40 years. Talk about a journey. What fascinated me as I continued to read about this journey was that you get a real sense of this stage by stage movement in Numbers 33 where over 40 times in the first 48 verses of that chapter that the community "left" a place and "camped" somewhere else. We are a people faced with constant change and alw

About 5 years ago I was introduced to a therapy model that changed my life. And that's not an exaggeration. It literally changed my life, beginning with me, then my marriage, then my parenting, then my therapy work, then friendships, and eventually in the work I do with organizations, churches and corporations. I was introduced to a model of therapy developed by Terry Hargrave called Restoration Therapy. Actually, at the time I didn't know it as Restoration Therapy, but rather as the 5 Days to a New Marriage model that was developed for The Hideaway Experience by Terry and Shawn Stoever. Essentially, from what I know, Terry and Shawn created a model for the marriage intensives based on Terry's Restoration Therapy work that he was developing, and which was eventually written by Terry and Franz Pfitzer under the title Restoration Therapy: Understanding and Guiding Healing in Marriage and Family Therapy.   In October 2010 I attended my first marriage intensive and sat "3rd chair", which essentially means I was n

As a kid I loved to run. Whether it was chasing or racing friends, running was something that I grew up loving to do. And I continued to run in high school, competing in the 110 meter high hurdles, 300 meter intermediate hurdles and the 4 x 400. But somewhere over the years I noticed I stopped running as much. Sure, I still ran a couple of nights a week, but that was more of an ad on to my weight lifting routine, and just another avenue that I thought would help me stay fit. But in the Spring of 2006 my brother Wyatt called me to see if I wanted to run the Chicago Marathon with him. I don't remember the details of our conversation, but I remember agreeing to do do with very little hesitancy. Sure, I had never run more than 3 miles at one time in my life, but that didn't seem to bother me. I guess I figured I would....figure it out. So I trained for 16 weeks and ended up running the marathon in about 4:13. And at that moment I became addicted to running. I entered another marathon, ran a few 5K's, half-maratho

I love interviewing guests on this podcast, but summer has been a bit difficult on the podcast schedule with so many people on vacation and needing to reschedule. But I have some great guests lined up for the future and we will cover some interesting topics. So for this week I decided I wanted to cover two questions that I seem to inevitably get when I'm out speaking on marriage and parenting. The questions come in a variety of forms, but they essentially boil down this this: When is a good time to go see a marriage therapist? How many activities can my kid participate in? Those are the questions in essence, but often what isn't being explicitly asked is really what the question is about. For example, in that first question, what is often being asked but not said is, "We have issues in our marriage, but I don't know if we should get help." Or, "I want to go in and see a counselor, but my spouse doesn't want to." Or, "Is it too late to go and get help." I get the question a lot because marriages suffer from

About 4-5 years ago my wife and I's life was in a pretty hectic place. Like many of you, we were a double-income family, trying to both balance out time for our work, our family life, and our marriage. And like many of you, we sort of felt like life was just sort of happening to us. We felt like we were more passive observants of our own life, rather than intentionally participating in it. And at about that same time, my good friend and colleague Todd Sandel had started talking to me about a book that had really helped his family's life. Todd is married with four kids, and I really admire what he and his wife Beverly have created in their family. So I was eager to learn the trick. Todd mentioned that he had read and implemented the book The 3 Big Questions for a Frantic Family: A Leadership Fable About Restoring Sanity to the Most Important Organization in Your Life by Patrick Lencioni. So I went home and read that book as quickly as I could. And over the course of the next year my wife and I sat down to read

I enjoy interviewing all the guests on my podcast. It's a huge privilege to be able to talk with such amazing people. And this one was really special as I got to interview one of the former students in my college ministry. Between 2001-2008 I was on staff at Bel Air Presbyterian Church in Los Angeles, CA, serving as the college pastor from 2002-2008. And in that time I was really blessed to serve alongside some amazing students from UCLA, USC, LMU and a scattering of other schools. There was also a huge contingent of college-age kids in the ministry who weren't in school, but came out to pursue music, film, fashion and more. It was a really unique group that taught me a lot.   And in about 2004 I met a then sophomore at UCLA, Melissa Ponce, who is now Dr. Melissa Esguerra. I remember Melissa as someone who was really passionate about her faith, compassionate towards others, and who always seemed to have a smile on her face. And it was great having her as a part of that ministry at that time. It's been about 1

Anxiety is a struggle that everyone has experienced at some point in their lives. Anxiety is part of the human condition whether we like it or not. But while some people seem to experience little anxiety, others feel their life is consumed with it. I've shared in countless contexts how I struggled for a good part of my life with anxiety until I finally began to face it and use it as an opportunity for growth in my life. In episode 13 of this podcast I explored the topic of anxiety and one can begin to identify anxiety in their own life story, as well as learning to begin to reframe it as a catalyst for growth, rather than an enemy waiting to crush you. In that podcast I mentioned how I would follow up with an episode exploring the various tools and techniques one can use to manage and reframe anxiety. So in this episode I talk about: the tool of reframing anxiety how self-care (physical, emotional, mental and spiritual) helps manage anxiety breathing techniques to help with anxiety meditation techniques and

About 5 weeks ago I was perusing through Instagram and I came across the feed of lvtrailrunner. I have been following lvtrailrunner (aka Benji Zimmerman) online for quite a while, and I have really been inspired by what he posts, especially his amazing trail running photos. But something different caught my eye this day...it was what he had to say on that post that really captured me. Benji wrote: "Some days life isn't in color. For many of us anxiety, depression and many other mental health issues loom in the shadows of our lives, but some days those shadows overtake our colorful world. Today was one of those days for me. Days like today are hard to explain to those who don't share the same struggle. If you are someone who struggles like I do with depression; stay the course, talk to your counselor, eat right, workout, take your medications if necessary but above all cling to hope. The color will return. The storm will pass. Breathe in. Breathe out." Such beautiful, and powerful, and vulnerable, and inspirin

I first met Aubrey McGowan approximately in the summer of 2010. And like some other stories you have previously heard on this podcast, we met at the ECHO Conference in Dallas. At that time Aubrey was leading worship (as well as doing all kinds of other things...mentoring, vision casting, etc.) at Hope Fellowship in Frisco, TX. Since our first meeting a deep friendship has formed and I have really come to admire a lot of things about him. Two things in particular that have stood out to me over the last five years is Aubrey's generous spirit and his ability to solve problems and build just about anything.   Over the course of the last couple of years I noticed our conversations had shifted in some ways as Aubrey began to wrestle with new questions. There was a restlessness in him that God was calling him to step out and do some different things, but there was also a very patient steadfastness as he prayed, made plans, and listened to God's direction in his life.   I've really enjoyed watching Aubrey and his wif

I have struggled with anxiety most of my life. The story of anxiety in my life begins probably somewhere between 1981 and 1986. Those were the years my mother battled breast cancer, eventually dying in 1986 when I was 11 years old. As best as I can remember, the onset of anxiety for me began two weeks after her death when I returned to school and was no longer capable of reading out loud in class...only stuttering. That was the day that I began to live in fear as anxiety gripped my life, but more than likely it had already begun it's work in those previous years with the ups and downs of my mom's struggle with breast cancer. My anxiety has its roots in those early experiences, and like me, you probably have recollections of when anxiety began in your life. Often it can begin in childhood, especially if we have a parent who is highly anxious, or we encounter some experience to provoke anxiety. Whatever your story, anxiety may be a part of yours. Most of the research I come across these days is that anxiety dis

This episode was definitely a Rhett Smith Podcast first. My brother-in-law Drew Sams and I went for a long 10 mile trail run earlier in the day, and spent our recovery time hanging outside in his backyard jacuzzi. And so we decided to just record the conversation there. So you are going to hear some helicopters and sirens in the background...and we are a bit delirious by the end of the podcast (I guess two hours in a jacuzzi isn't that smart when you are tired).   But this is a great episode and we explore a lot of interesting things. I first met Drew back in 2001 when he was a USC senior and I had just taken the position of college ministry intern at Bel Air Presbyterian Church. Drew and I became really good friends that senior year of his, eventually leading my wife and I (then girlfriend) to set her sister and him up on a blind date. That blind date turned into marriage in 2006. And throughout the years our paths have crossed in other ways as well, whether at Fuller Theological Seminary, or both being on s

We all live in a very busy, very fast paced culture. And in our constant hurry it is often our self-care that goes by the wayside. We stop taking care of ourselves physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually, often finding ourselves in a worse predicament than when we began. In this episode I really wanted to explore some spiritual practices that can help us foster our faith in the busyness of our day-to-day stress. And so in order to do that, I brought on my father Timothy Smith. If you listened to Episode 3 on transitions, liminal space and discovering your passion, then you know my dad has been a guest on my podcast before. My dad wears many hats: father, husband, pastor, chaplain, spiritual director, writer, professor, retreat director...and on and on the list goes. But when we recorded this episode he was out visiting and wearing I think one of his most favorite hats...grandpa. So while he was out here we sat down and explored 7 Spiritual Practices for Busy People: Daily God Hunt (aka The Greatest

In the Summer of 2008 I was sitting in my inlaw's home office working on their computer. My wife, 1 year old daughter and I had just moved from Los Angeles to Dallas to live a more compelling story, but we knew very few people except for some family we had in the DFW area. So there I was online looking for some way to connect with people in Dallas. At the time I was pretty involved in the online intersection of faith and technology, and so it was with great interest that I saw that a brand new conference was taking place in Dallas a couple of weeks after our move. The conference was the ECHO Conference, and it was there that I met so many great people...many who have come to be some of my closest friends today. One of those great people was Scott McClellan, who at the time was a part of the organization who was putting on the conference. To this day, I look back at that conference as really helping me get connected in a new city. The ECHO Conference may no longer exist, but my relationships from them exist. A

I first met John Dyer online somewhere in the summer of 2008. I was engaged online quite a bit at the intersection of faith and technology. I am definitely not an expert in technology, but there was a period of about 4-5 years where I spent a lot of time at social media and technology conferences, workshops, meetups, etc. And during that time I spoke quite a bit on how technology shapes our relationships. But it was when I met John in person in the Fall of 2008 and we started hanging out, that I really began to understand truly how technology shapes us. Some of John's work that really shaped me early on you can find in his presentation Technology is not Neutral: How Bible Technology Shapes our Faith. This presentation is a good introduction into John's thoughts on technology. And these thoughts powerfully shaped how I understood the role of technology in my life, especially understanding that it is not neutral, but is always shaping us in some way. The question is, how is the technology we are using shape us?

I first got to connect with Adam McLane when we were driving through the Dominican Republic, and across the border into Haiti. It was only about a month after the devastating earthquake that hit Haiti, and we were part of a youth ministry team that went down there (though as Adam points out, it was more like a bunch of youth pastors and me -- a therapist). Over the course of those last five years I have had the opportunity to really connect and get to know Adam better, as well as speaking at his initial Youth Cartel in 2012, on the topic of, The Anxiety of Teenagers.But in the last 5 years Adam has become one of the leading experts on youth and technology. In August of 2013, Adam's expertise really gained attention when his blog post, "Why You Should Delete SnapChat" went viral, eventually taking shutting down his blog with all the traffic. But don't mistake Adam for some kind of anti-tech Luddite, rather he is a very thoughtful, thinker on technology and how it shapes our lives. And one of the things I reall

One of the issues that almost always comes up in my work with clients is the issue of forgiveness. It is the issue that often is not addressed, but the one that is most needed. So a few months ago when a pastor friend of mine asked me to come speak at his church's marriage conference he gave me the freedom to choose what I wanted to talk about. The obvious stuff came to mind instantly, communication....intimacy....sex....etc. So I thought about what I wanted to talk about for a few days and finally settled on the topic of forgiveness.Why did I settle on this topic?Because not only is it the one issue that I see in every counseling session (whether forgiveness is taking place or being withheld), but it's something I need to work on more in my own life. So it's not surprising I chose a topic that I most need to grow in.I ended up giving this talk 2x in the course of 8 days. One time at the church marriage conference mentioned above, which took place at Preston Trail church in Frisco, TX. But I also gave the tal

As I say in the introduction of this podcast, Wess Daniels is one of the smartest guys that I know. I first met Wess about ten years ago or more when I was a student at Fuller Theological Seminary and pastoring at Bel Air Presbyterian Church. I started hanging out with Wess when he was teaching me some tech hacks in creating my Apple HTML email signature (I know, sounds pretty exciting). But over the years as my friendship with Wess has deepened, I've always been impressed with not only his intellect, and the topics is spans, but his sense of humility.Wess received his Ph.D from Fuller Seminary's School of Intercultural Studies. Wess is especially interested in Quaker renewal and participatory culture. At the time of this interview he was a Quaker pastor at Camas Friends church in Washington....but last week he was named the Director of Friends Center and Quaker Studies at Guilford College.Wess is also the author of A Convergent Model of Renewal: Remixing the Quaker Tradition in a Participatory Culture. Besid

 This was a really fun podcast episode to record. I drove down to Dallas a couple of weeks ago to spend a couple of hours with Innovation 360's Executive Director Kevin Gilliland, and Director of Marketing Lauren Barnett. I first came across the work of Innovation 360 when I met up with Lauren and another colleague over coffee one morning. And in the last 3 years I have been continually impressed not only with Lauren and Kevin, but the whole team at Innovation 360. I love their all encompassing approach to mental health, which involves caring for the physical, emotional, mental and spiritual lives of those they come alongside of.Not only our Kevin and Lauren involved in mental health, but they are avid triathletes. And when I say avid, I mean Lauren is professionally sponsored, and not only won first place in her first , but she has been on the podium ever since. And Kevin competes regularly in triathlons, completing two races. These two are people who strive to take care of themselves physically, emotionally

About two years ago I came across Sarah Stanley online which led to a few email exchanges about running and health. And over the course of the last two years I have been both continually impressed and encouraged as I have watched her explore the outer limits of her abilities (physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually) through her ulta-running, all the while being fueled on a plant based diet.  And her running resume is impressive: 26 marathons, Boston qualifying, 7 50 mile races, and 4 100 mile races...and on and on and on. The intersection of running and food has been resonating with me the last couple of years and is the reason why I wanted to sit down with Sarah and interview her on my podcast. As you will be able to tell from this interview, Sarah is full of life, and is passionate about so many things. I love that excitement and I love the message she brings at the intersection of our fitness, food and faith.     In this podcast we will explore: being born and growing up on one of the first cert

My dad is an amazing guy. Besides being my father he has taken on many roles over the course of his life such as church planter, pastor, professor, prison chaplain, hospice chaplain, writer, teacher, speaker, spiritual director, radio show host...and co-founder of Water from Rock which is a non-profit ministry based in Scottsdale, AZ, and which provides weekly classes, workshops, retreats, Lenten and Advent devotionals and much, much more. So all that to say, my dad is incredibly wise and has a lot of important insight into some of the issues that we all at times find ourselves struggling with.In this episode, my dad sits down with a couple of weeks after my 40th birthday as we explore the importance of how we navigate significant life transitions; what it means to discover our passion and how we can go about exploring that; as well as looking at the role of "letting go" in our journey through life so that we may more fully embrace the work of God in our lives.We talk about and cover all kinds of topics in th