Speak Loud

What a joy it was to speak with Rena Romano for the last episode of the season. Rena has gone from childhood sexual abuse to contemplating suicide, from appearing on the Oprah Show to the TEDx stage. She’s a respected speaker, author, TEDx coach, and a “sur-THRIVER” of abuse with a mission to show people how to live the endless possibilities of positive life after trauma. Rena’s abuse persisted for nearly 20 years, from age 4. At such a young age, she had no language for what was happening to her, and was unable to speak up about what she was going through. When she was older, she knew it would have torn her family apart to speak up, but as an adult reflects that it’s not the child’s responsibility to stop the crime. Even after escaping her situation, Rena still struggled with abuse in early adulthood. Perpetrators of rape and abuse were like a lion sniffing out blood, sensing when their victims are most weak or wounded. Rena was addicted to abuse, believing it to be what love looked like, and continued to at

Today's amazing guest is  Amy Nordhues. Amy is an author, passionate Christ follower, and a married mother of 3 who became an expert on the healing God provides after suffering sexual abuse at the hands fo a mental health professional. Her book, “Prayed Upon” tells the true story of her escape from the abuse of a respected, Church-going psychiatrist. Amy strives to help other victims understand themselves and know that they're not alone.Amy first met her psychiatrist 7 years before the abuse started. She had sensed something amiss immediately and had not gone back. Upon finding and falling in love with a church community, where he was one of the elders, Amy found herself sucked in again. Other Church-goers praised the doctor’s work, and when a friend gave Amy her session for free, the grooming had begun. Amy says that part of her recognized the malpractice right away, but she struggled with an internal monologue that explained away any of the red flags she noticed. Her desire to be polite in front o

Kevin Palmeri, is an entrepreneur and podcaster from Next Level University. With more than 800 episodes so far, Kevin is dedicated to overcoming limitations, and feels he has a responsibility to be authentic and vulnerable on his platform. At 25, Kevin had the ‘perfect life’: a beautiful girlfriend, a sports car, a high-paying job. But when his girlfriend left him, Kevin realized he had spent 25 years working on his wallet, and not himself. He started to change, but leaned too far into his financial goal of making six-figures. By the time he reached his goal, he felt no different. Kevin describes one morning before work when he realized how low he was. He struggled with suicidal thoughts, including doubts about his podcast, which was only a passion project at the time. Upon calling a friend, his later co-host and business partner, Kevn realized it was time to change his environment. He traded his current problems for better ones by diving into his new business. “Hurdles never go away, you just get better at j

Joining me today is Gina Rolkowski, who believes because you’ve been traumatized, doesn’t mean you can’t lead a purposeful life. She talks about how trauma victims have a choice, how we can be mindfully aware of what is going on in our minds and bodies, and how to take back control of our lives.Reliving Trauma and Repeating the PatternGrowing up experiencing sexual abuse as a child, Gina didn’t remember her experience until her 40’s. At age six, she had chronic stomach aches, and her doctor told her parents she was doing it for the attention. Then, at 14, she had issues with her period and started having seizures. Looking back, she realizes that the seizures were part of emotional defense and overload from her abuse. Getting pregnant at 19, she married an abusive husband. She divorced her husband and experienced severe PTSD, depression, and anxiety. Next, Gina turned to illegal drugs and alcohol to soothe her emotional trauma. Her doctors gave her a cocktail of drugs for her symptoms, which didn’t change the

Joining me today is S.F. Banks, who is doing phenomenal work in our community with our youth. In 2007 he opened up an I.M. Defense Institute, which shows women and men how to defend themselves from attackers. He also has a youth program and is a creator of Camp  Warrior King, exposing youth to upbeat, fun activities. In addition, S.F. founded You Can Have It All, a youth conference, and the accompanying You Can Have It All youth magazine. Lastly, he created Team Hot Sauce, a cartoon storytelling platform for youth.Overcoming Your PastSF is a big believer in taking the pains from your past and making those into the beauty of your future. “Let those things that you’ve overcome, fuel you towards your future.” Having two aunts - one that was murdered by her husband, along with murdering their child (his cousin), and another aunt who suffered severe brain damage from her husband, S.F. is on a mission to help women defend themselves as a result of these experiences he had as a child. “I still have a toy of my cousi

With me today is Michael, who is here to speak loud about something not many people speak about. Michael is dedicated to ending the silence around male sexual abuse survivors, after a harrowing journey with sexual abuse, alcohol and drug addiction and mental illness. Michael grew up in a violent, emotionally and physically abusive household, because of his mother. At 14, he entered a sexually abusive situation with an older woman. He was obsessed with her, unaware of the negative impact the situation was having on him. When a family counselor unearthed the truth, neither they nor Michael’s parents addressed the abuse. Instead, he was grounded. He began drinking and experiencing mental health spirals that led to a brush with suicide. “I was wild, disruptive, like a grenade without a pin,” Michael says.  After high school, Michael was in the bar business for 27 years, with unlimited access to alcohol and compulsive sex. At 22, his father passed away, and Michael developed the mindset that good people, like his

Joining me today is Alyssa Chambers, a mother of 2 and owner of Bonnie’s Joy Pinup. She has quite the journey to share, and is here to speak loud about putting in the work of ‘de-programming’ abuse, both in victim and abuser. She’s currently working with a trauma coach, which is what she describes as the difference between her and her abusers: that she is actively working on becoming a better person.Alyssa grew up in an environment that had rampant forms of abuse. Her parents taught her by example to deal with things in an unhealthy way, oftentimes with alcohol or drugs. She describes her parents as ill-equipped and not present in her childhood. The circumstances she grew up in left her and her siblings at risk for predators, trauma, and abuse. There was no one instance of trauma or traumatic event in her life. What she needed to truly heal was a sense of stability. Alyssa values where she came from, but wouldn’t wish it on anyone else. No child deserves to grow up in such harsh circumstances, but she recogni

Today I’m joined by Shelli Howells, an alignment coach, crystal reiki master, and light language practitioner. Shelli is “not afraid of the dark,” having recovered from trauma and 11 years of a chronic autoimmune disease. She guides her clients in soul-lead healing, championing the small and encouraging transformation. Shelli, along with her sisters and cousins, experienced sexual abuse from her grandfather at a young age. For many years, Shelli had to compartmentalize her trauma into an imaginary thing. Her grandfather was “the monster under the bed,” the abuse a bad dream she blocked out. Part of Shelli’s healing was confronting that trauma years later, after her younger sister brought the experiences to light. She had to forgive herself for not being able to protect herself and the more vulnerable, and make peace with the past after her grandfather had died. Having come out the other side, Shelli’s grateful for her history preparing her to be who she is now. Shelli states her trauma brought her body to a p

Today I’m joined by Amanda Ferrat, founder of “Value Yourself Counseling,” certified Emotional Wellness Counselor, and EFT practitioner. Amanda is a queer, disabled woman who strives to create safe spaces for women to empower and guide them through grief and hardship.Raised in Montana, Amanda was sassy and outspoken from the start. But as she grew up, Amanda found her voice silenced by those around her. It wasn’t until she went to college that she started to “ask for forgiveness rather than permission.” Amanda believes she’s so outspoken now because of how much she was shut down as a child. During college, Amanda lost several loved ones. Within two years, she was out of fingers and toes to count them on. With her life derailed, Amanda decided to take a step back from school for her mental health. As the dust settled, she asked, “How am I going to use this?” The universe was telling her she was ready to move on to something new. Amanda realized her business, “Value Yourself Coaching,” to work as a grief and se

Today I am joined by Tracey Osborne, CEO of the Global Association for Trauma Recovery and a certified trauma recovery coach. A ‘survivor and thriver’ of abuse, Tracy uses her voice to raise awareness, connect with other survivors, and provide resources to help heal trauma globally. Early life for Tracey was turbulent and confusing. Her parents separated when she was 5, causing feelings of abandonment that followed her into adulthood. She went from living with both parents to living with her grandmother, and later her father and step-mother. Her step-mother was the first perpetrator of abuse: narcissistic, manipulative, and invasive of Tracey’s privacy. At age 15, she was sent to Canada for a year to live with family she had never met. This ended up being the best year of her life, and she learned what healthy parenting looked like. She also met the boy who would later become her husband. In adulthood, Tracey had several abusive relationships. She had been pregnant twice by the age of 23. She explains how she

In this episode, I talk to author, speaker, and professional bodybuilder Jewels. Jewels wrote "The Making of a Woman: From the Inside Out" and is here to speak about childhood abuse, alcoholism, recovery and rediscovery. Jewels hopes she can reach people and show that ‘it’--whatever ‘it’ is--is not pretty, but is possible. Jewels describes her early life as the 'first stage,' one that she had to endure to evolve. The first Jewels was small, and according to her, scared. Suddenly one-in-five kids after her mother remarried, Jewels suffered abuse in the shadows. Her silence was her way of coping with the abuse, which went on for three years.At 14 she dropped out of school and left home. She had started drinking, drugs, and brought those bad habits into adulthood. Jewels was 'functioning with a 10-year-old's idea of what adults do.' She lacked guidance. But during this time, her mother was her rock as she was her cheerleader when Jewels was 'circling the drain,’ and handed

In this episode, I talk with AnneMarie Shrouder, a diversity and inclusion speaker and consultant. She’s the author of, “Being Brown in a Black-and-White World: Conversations for Leaders about Race, Racism and Belonging,” and a mother. Today, she’s here to talk about the reality of being “bi-racial” in a world that encourages you to choose one or the other. AnneMarie was raised in Montreal by two immigrant parents: a mother from Austria and a father from Jamaica. Growing up, AnneMarie was more connected to her mother’s side of her family. But in many social situations, she was either 'too black' or 'too white' to fit in. She felt pressured to choose one or the other, and didn't come to the realization that she could choose 'both, and,' until adulthood. Overcoming that polarization of 'either or' was an most empowering part of her journey. AnneMarie talks about some of the struggles she’s faced in raising her daughter. Her daughter racially identifies as black, whil

Today's guest is Murielle Fellous, we are speaking about emotional mastery through EFT tapping. Murielle is a single mother of 3, who discovered EFT while raising her teenage children. Her journey inspired her to create ‘Co-Parenting With the Universe,’ through which she helps single moms in their own journeys through parenthood. Murielle felt herself spiraling during her kids' teenage years. She discovered EFT tapping as a powerful tool to interrupt those spirals. She used EFT first on herself, and later on her kids, and saw amazing results. She now practices clinical EFT, which she shares in her coaching. Her goal is to prevent other women from going where she went during her struggles as a single mother. Murielle says that falling into the depths of anxiety or depression helps no one: not the moms, not the kids. EFT works by soothing the nervous system while thinking about an emotional stressor. By tapping meridian points on the body, EFT eases the physical response we feel to anxiety or trauma.A

In this episode, I’m chatting with Danny Greeves, who’s across the pond in Norwich, England. Danny is a physio and hypnotherapist, author, and winner of the Prestige 2021 Life Coach of the Year Award for London. He also has a 12-week program called “Speak Up and Stand Out” where he helps people realize their value and express it to the world. With bright orange hair, Danny didn’t always get much of a choice in being seen as a child. He found it hard to express himself and be emotionally vulnerable. This struggle followed him into adulthood, as he floundered in relationships. Once he made the decision to seek help, Danny became fascinated with how the mind works. The more he learned, the more confident he became. This snowballed into a desire to work professionally, and a love for helping others have more self-confidence. Within ten days after deciding to get help, Danny met the woman who would later become his wife. After thorough research, Danny “cracked a code” and devised his 12-week program that consisten

In this episode, I’m chatting with Christine, a podcast producer who has worked under Louis Hauz and his production company for several years. Christine teaches people how to podcast like a pro. “I train teams to become in-house media producers.”Finding a Common Thread Amongst Successful GuestsDeciding to leave her corporate job, Christine cold-called a podcast producer and convinced him to produce his show. Moving to LA, she learned her new career on the job. During this time in her life, she was exposed to famous, successful people and realized the throughline for the guests. “Everyone had a rock-bottom moment, a reckoning of their worth, and a key decision where they pivoted and followed their calling.” In addition, the guests found their self-worth, which gave them the means to become successful.Coming Into the World with Innate WorthThe idea that we are already full of worth has meaning for Christine; she calls it "worthful" - the concept being that we are always full of worth. Exploring the co

In this episode, I’m chatting with Terry Tucker, who is a resident of Denver, Colorado,  a father of one daughter who is a Lieutenant in the Space Force and a husband of 28 years. Besides playing in the NCAA, Terry has also authored a book, is a blogger, and has been an officer on the local SWAT team where he lived, and is currently battling a rare form of cancer.Family and SportsWhile he had a great family growing up, Terry was picked on because of his height. At the age of 13, he grew to 6’5”, with big ears and a size 14 shoe. Fortunately for Terry, he was great at basketball, which landed him a scholarship to college. After several knee surgeries, Terry learned several life skills from his days playing ball. The biggest lesson he learned from playing a team sport is the necessity to do your job as a player and learning that everyone is in the game together - the game he played and the game of life.From Athlete to SWAT TeamThe oldest of three boys, Terry was one of three athletes in the home, all standing a

In this episode, I’m chatting with Lily Walford.  Lily is an international relationship and dating coach specializing in behavioral profiling and body language. Lily is inspired and excited by having the creative freedom to use her passion for psychology and behavioral change to help relationships worldwide.Many people don’t realize the abuse that goes on in a relationship with this type of person. After three years of being in this relationship, Lily ended the relationship. However, her ex-boyfriend stalked her for the next five years. She went into two more toxic relationships and couldn’t figure out why she attracted these negative people.After using several behavioral therapy modalities, she found behavioral profiling and reading body language. These skills gave her the confidence to find the right relationship. When you love someone, you tend to make excuses for their behavior, known as confirmation bias. “We justify their behavior. When you’re in these types of situations, you create a story that allows

Please welcome my guest Cindy Mulonas!  She lives outside of Detroit, Michigan, and is the mother of three children. In addition, she has coached many high-profile personalities in her work and has helped them overcome childhood abuse.Being Attracted to Toxic Relationships“For some reason, in the past, I was attracted to people who were not good for me.” She met her boyfriend in high school and was dating him for some time when they moved to Michigan together. He publicly ridiculed and mocked Cindy, including making fun of her when she gained weight. After three years, she left that relationship and entered into another more abusive one.Looking Back at her JournalsWhen she looks back at her journals, she can see the patterns of abuse and what she lived through. At the age of 24, her boyfriend was gaslighting her and blaming her for all relationship issues. Cindy felt that she could change him and make him a different person. These are the moments she wants others to be aware of in relationships and how to avo

Chad Peevy joins me today. He’s an Arkansas native who grew up in an abusive household in a small, rural town. In addition, Chad had to hide his sexuality and learn how to lean into his own truth as an adult.Growing Up in ArkansasSome kids grow up with book smarts, some kids grow up with street smarts. Chad had to stay off his dad’s radar at home and tried to manipulate his environment to create safety at school. “For me that meant staying small, quiet, and avoiding confrontation.” At school, he also had a girlfriend to avoid gay slurs and sat on the school council so teachers would like him and offer him a shield of protection. He was constantly shifting and changing to stay safe and wasn’t able to be himself because of his environment.Changing Survival Skills in AdulthoodAs a kid, those survival skills Chad created worked well, but as an adult, he needed to change his tactics with a different set of adult challenges. “I created a mask that I wore with beliefs and mindsets that developed out of necessity.” A

My guest is Ashley Michelle, who has resided in London for the past decade. Her book, "Finding Strength Through Tragedy" sheds light on her life and how it was changed forever after she walked into a murder scene, hearing the door lock behind her, and being told she was next! Trusting her intuition helped her to escape, but her life has been filled with PTSD, depression, and anxiety from that moment on.Writing About Her Healing ProcessInstead of letting this traumatic moment take over her life, Ashley chose to write about the steps of her healing process to inspire others to turn around their lives after going through tough times. She wants to let others know they don't have to be a victim their entire life. "I want someone to look at me and say, because of you, I didn't give up!"Raising Awareness Around TraumaAshley wants to be a teaching tool for others to learn how to break free of trauma. Having a childhood of neglect and physical abuse, she brought those aspects into her fir