Fostering Voices Podcast

None of us know what we are doing as parents and are always looking for solid parenting advice. Julie Lythcott-Haims has some strong suggestions. She may possibly be the most quoted author on our podcast. She is the New York Times Best Selling Author of "How to Raise an Adult: Break free of the overparenting trap and prepare your kid for success", our most recommended book on parenting. Julie has a TedTalk on the same subject that has been watched over 6 MILLION times on YouTube and Ted.com combined. Through Julie's amazing graciousness - she is ON THE PODCAST in this episode about parenting, and becoming, and kindness! I died a million deaths of joy and awe before, during, and after the interview. Julie is WISE, and such a strong communicator, and full of kindness and empathy (as evidenced when she started crying within the first 5 minutes of our interview!) For a tiny piece of Julie's resume, she is a Stanford, and Harvard Law grad, and she was the Dean of Freshmen for a decade at Stanford. Which i

Leadership is something we talk about a lot on the podcast, because we are all leaders! It is your choice if you are going to be a good one, or not. Parenting is some of the hardest kind of leadership, because you are maxed out in your pay grade, because oh yeah - you don't make any money doing it! We talk about 2 books that we are reading and have read, but that came to our attention via podcasts we listened to. The first one is called "The Motive" by Patrick Lencioni, and we became aware of it when Lencioni was on The Andy Stanley Leadership Podcast.  You have to ask yourself if you are a Reward of Responsibility-centered leader. A reward-centered leader has worked hard to become a leader, and now that they are one - they feel like this is the end of their journey. They don't do hard or unpleasant work, and have the mindset that others should be serving them, and they have 'arrived'. A responsibility-centered leader sees their leadership role as the beginning of their journey. Now that they have gotten thei

We are beyond honored to have The Honorable Justice James Beene on our podcast! Justice Beene, aka Jim, has served on the supreme court in Arizona for the last year, and had served in Family and Juvenile court for over 4 years, here in Arizona. There is just SO much great stuff in this podcast, and we hope you enjoy this fantastic interview with a wise, and kind guest who truly cares for the futures of the young people in foster care, as well as their bio families, and the families who choose to foster. We had Kim Turner, a GAL, on our podcast on episode 53. If you want to learn more about the court system for foster kids, check out that episode as well. The Good Word of the Day "Persistence". That's a great word that Justice Beene's mother often reminded him of. And it's a great word for all of us to lean into in times of trouble and hardship. There is always great reward on the other side of hard work and persistence! If you have any questions for Justice Beene, we can pass them along to him. You can email

Trauma is something that is common to all humans. But trauma and abuse are not a part of everyone's story, but it is for this week's guest. Monica was put into foster care as a baby, and was soon adopted by an abusive family. She was actually put back into foster care a few years later, but then returned to the previous adoptive family. Talk about a traumatic childhood! But Monica is not defined by her trauma and pain, and she encourages others to get over their pain to fully heal, and fully understand how to receive love and give it away as an adult.  Tune in to hear how she rose above her difficult past, and how she is pressing forward with great love, and great hope and joy for the future. The Good Word of the Day: Honestly - we had too many! Monica dropped so many great nuggets of truth and wisdom on us! Our favorites are: "Jesus replied, "You do not realize now what I am doing, but later you will understand." - John 13:7 "It's not about perfection, it's progression." Author Unknown. BUT Joyce Meyers did

Foster care according to our 8 year old bio daughter, who has been a foster sibling for over 6 years, and our 10 year old daughter who we adopted out of foster care. This week's interview is sweet and short, but still has lots of great nuggets to encourage you and your family on your personal journey. The Good Word of the Day "Yet I will rejoice in the Lord, I will be joyful in God my Savior. The Sovereign Lord is my strength;  he makes my feet like the feet of a deer, he enables me to tread on the heights." - Habakkuk 3:18-19 We hope you have a great week, and tune in again next week for another great interview! If you would like to connect: Fostering Voices on Instagram Jihae on Instagram and Chris on Facebook You can also email us at hello@fosteringvoices.com AND we would LOVE it if you would SUBSCRIBE and leave us a review on iTunes! This helps others to find our podcast so we can share these voices from the foster care and adoption community with more people!

It's easy to forget why we are fostering, or why it's important to be involved in foster care. And this week, I (Jihae) became a licensed foster care trainer. Which means I will start teaching prospective foster parents to get licensed. And having to go through Foster Parent College as part of my training, helped me to remember the trials and tribulations that come with foster care. But not for the foster parent, but for the foster kids. So in this episode, we go through an exercise that reminds us of all that our kids are facing. This is an exercise that we invite you to do with us. And this is also a great exercise that you can do as a family as you prepare to have foster children join your family.  Grab 5 post its, or pieces of paper for each person, and then write 5 things you absolutely love and that are a part of your daily life. Don't write 5 individual people's names, you can cluster those into 'family', 'friends', etc. And then, one by one, drop one of those things in order of priority to you. And ch

This week's episode focuses on building community in your actual neighborhood! We talk about the importance of community all the time. But it's easier to build community at work, or at church, maybe in a foster support group, or sports' team. But how about where you actually live? Do you know your neighbors' names?  All of us want to help out people in need - like if your neighbor was going through cancer treatments, you would want to help them, right? But how would you know they have cancer if you don't even know their names?? Lindsay Watson, our sister-in-law and next-door neighbor, shares how she started our neighborhood's monthly meetings and Group Me text thread. Our neighborhood is THE best. And maybe yours is too, you just don't know it yet! First Mondays This is a thing that Lindsay started where the neighborhood ladies gather on someone's driveway around 8pm. Kids are usually in bed. No one has to clean their house. You bring your own folding chair and beverage of choice (no judgement), and an open h

Let's try this again! We are definitely going to give you some great tips and tricks on how to run a big (or small, or medium!) household efficiently. But, I just need you guys to know that this episode was a real pain to get out into the world! I posted it once - and it just disappeared. So I rewrote the show notes, much shorter than the first time; and then the audio was SO BAD that we had to take that episode down IMMEDIATELY. And so here I am, writing these shownotes for the THIRD TIME! And, we re-recorded the whole episode. So, enjoy! You would think that being on episode 103, we would know what we were doing... **palm to face. Oraganization So in this week's episode, we talk about the importance of being organized!  When we were a small family of 4 - we were super disorganized! Our house was a mess, as were our finances! But we have found that with each child we add to our home, the more we NEED order, schedules, routines, and a BUDGET! We talked about this calendar and chores chart, which is definit

Thanks for joining us for another episode of our podcast! This episode is a conversation about RACE, and why we need to check ourselves, and our thoughts on race. Books on Race We read this great book called Why Are All The Black Kids Sitting Together in the Cafeteria by Beverly Daniel Tatum, PhD. She discusses race in such a way that makes you really try to understand the many issues faced by our Black and Brown brothers and sisters. We highly recommend this book for you to start thinking about your biases in race. At Showit, we have been talking about race quite a bit. Showit is a sponsor of this podcast, and we are proud users, and supporters, and employees of Showit! Read this blog article that further discusses this book by Tatum. This article is very helpful in educating us about how to talk about race with our children, and having more books with diversity on our shelves. This is SO IMPORTANT as foster and adoptive families. Not everyone in your family will ‘match’, and that’s a beautiful things!

Welcome back to our podcast, friends! We took a few weeks off, and are so excited to be back with you all.  Over the last few weeks, we have: - Gone to San Diego for 48 hours (we live 6 hours away via car) and jammed 13 people into a 3 bedroom Air BnB. - Gone golfing 3 times! Two times it was 109 degrees, and therefore much more affordable, but also kind of miserable. - Did a 36 hour staycation while doing an online Marriage Conference with Don and Renee Worcester. You should call resorts near you to see what they are offering! We stayed here for $99 and with a $25 food and drink credit! When we booked online, it was over $250 with no food or drink credit. - Helped live stream a mini wedding. And almost got fired, because we aren't very good camera people... But congrats to Nick and Adria! They are one of our couples that we did Premarital Counseling with, this year. Our other couple - Devin and Keenan Murray, also got married during quarantine! Congrats cute couples! Check out this amazing wedding video of t

 EPISODE 100!!!! We made it! And we are so thankful to be able to bring you an absolutely incredible interview with our friend - Wendy Nguyen, of Wendy's Lookbook! Wendy has been a fashion blogger for about 10 years now, and maybe you know her because you are one of her 1.1 million followers on Instagram. But Wendy is so very much more than a pretty face, with incredible fashion sense. Wendy found herself in foster care at the age of 15. She has been fending for herself ever since (and who am I kidding, before then too.) Wendy shares her powerful story with us - not to entertain or shock us - but to show us that grit will propel you! To foster parents: We speak to foster parents (moms especially), and those involved in the foster care system as workers, that we can, and all need to, do better. Showing up more consistently for those in need. Showing up whole heartedly for those in need. Not guarding ourselves from the pain of separation - but loving fiercely for the seasons that we are supposed to love fiercel

If you want to start a podcast, this is the episode for you! We sat down for over an hour with Davey Jones, of Davey and Krista , The Brands that Book Podcast, and the Till Agency.  As you can see, we are on Episode 99, and the Brands that Book Podcast is at 96 episodes at the time of this episode going live. So, we definitely know a thing or two about starting a podcast, and maintaining it. The only thing that isn't amazing on this episode is that the audio isn't the best when Chris or I are speaking... This is admittedly the first remote interview that we are airing, and so we are still learning and expanding our podcast as well! But Davey sounds great! And this podcast is also available on YouTube in case you like to watch people talk about podcasts. So, some advice: - Don't get stuck on all the things you think you should do - and just do what you can do. If you have Wifi, a good phone, and a great idea for a podcast - you are basically ready to start podcasting! - Think about your audience, and who they

We are so thankful to be able to welcome Dr. Ray Branton back to the podcast this week. If you missed it - we talked about marriage and relationships in Episode 97. You are definitely going to want to listen to that one as well! This week we are talking about ANXIETY. Does that give you anxiety to just see the word? Well, something that you need to know is that anxiety is NORMAL. And it's beneficial. As long as it doesn't paralyze you and cause you to not be able to function properly. But we have overpathologized fear and worry, and that's why it seems like everyone is struggling with anxiety. What many of us need is more balance in our lives. We don't need to be lawnmower parents - paving the way for our kids to have no trials or tribulation. We also shouldn't spend all of our time on social media, since that has been proven to cause users to feel less satisfied with their lives due to comparison analysis. Instead, Dr. Branton encourages us to replace the word 'anxiety' with 'curiosity'. You may be anxious a

This week we are so thankful to be able to welcome our friend, Ray Branton to the podcast! He shares practical ways to have successful, and meaningful relationships - with your friends, but especially with your spouse! Things that are important to remember in relationship is to empathize and listen. Feel what the other is feeling, and hear their hearts. Another major key is to remember that you are both on the same team! This is crucial to remembering that your spouse has good intentions, even if they may have done or said something negative. Empathy is the glue of good relationships. Some signs of a healthy marriage is whether or not you can move through conflict quickly. Not in 10 minutes, but also not in 10 days. Or 10 months. Actually talking through your conflict, and both parties feeling like they have been heard and seen.  Another sign of a healthy marriage is that you have fun and you laugh together! But this can only be done when you create a safe place for everyone in the relationship to feel valued

This is one of our shortest episodes - clocking in at just under 20 minutes! We wanted to do a nice light episode where our listeners could get to know us a bit better, without having to hear us retell our life stories. Which come up here and there over the last 95 episodes. So, we answer these 3 questions, which are really great conversation starters. Use them as an ice breaker next time you are in a group! 1. What is something difficult you overcame in your childhood? 2. When is a time when you were very scared? 3. What are your highs and lows of... (fill in the blank.) Ours was foster care. The Good Word of the Day "Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken." - Ecclesiastes 4:12 There have been too many times throughout our lives when we have been weak and overpowered, but we are thankful for our marriage, and our relationship with our community, and with the Lord, that we are not broken or overtaken. Find your community. Let them hold you up wh

In Arizona, foster parents need to complete 12 hours of training every year in order to keep their license open. Chris and I managed to get 9 in, and had to take 3 hours online. And when I say we did '3 hours', the trainings we picked gave us '3 hours', but it took us less than 1 hour to read through a long article, take a 20 question multiple choice test, and we were done. And by the way - Chris and I both got 100% on our tests. That's a not so humble brag right there! If you are in need of training hours, you can google it for the state you live in. But your best bet is to ask your licensing worker from your agency, and they should have a list of trainings you can take in person, or online. Chris and I went through fosterparents.com/training. We were issued certificates once we were done, and then we emailed those to our case worker. It's very simple, and though the website is ugly, the trainings offered are pretty good!  Chris did his training on Feelings, and I did mine on Loss. They were very intermingle

This week's episode is all about how to get licensed for foster care right now. We are still in the middle of a global pandemic, and so it is actually easier to get licensed right now, than ever before. Because all of the classes, and most of the requirements can be done online! And it's also easier - cause you have no where to go! No sports, or dinner commitments, or even work functions to go to. You are home. You can watch all the classes on your computer! Kirsten Abiatti, a former foster mom, adoptive mom, and amazing director at Arizona127, shares just how simple it is to get licensed, and things we should expect along the way. So go to Arizona 127 to see how you can get started today! Go to DCS's official website to report any abuse or to learn more about becoming a foster parent today. We also had Lindsay Stamm of Arizona 127 on the podcast before. She was on episode 59, and you should check that episode out as well! The Good Word of the Day 1. "God is more pleased by our willingness to be faithful alon

A few years ago, I read this book called 'Giftology' by John Ruhlin. John is the #1 Cutco salesman in the history of the company. He prides himself on getting to this position thanks to his ability to make a lasting impression, and understanding the fine art of giving gifts.  With Mother's Day around the corner - and even if you don't listen to this right when we release these episodes, there are always birthdays, Christmas, and other opportunities to buy thoughtful gifts for our loved ones. So we encourage you to listen to this episode to get some tips! We also share our engagement story in this episode, as we are celebrating our 15 year engagement anniversary this week! But the other reason we share our story is because so often engagement stories are a great example of how it's easy to forget the desires and needs of the recipient of the gift, and to just focus on the needs and desires of the giver of the gift (that's you.) However - that is not the case in our story! Chris made an elaborate plan to propos

How are you holding up friends? This week's  episode starts off with us talking about a rough day in the Watson household. Is it because of quarantine? Or PMS? Or just parenting? Maybe all of the above. Then we get into the meat of the episode - which is about a great book we read - "Safe House" by Dr. Josh Straub. In this book, they talk about how EMOTIONAL SAFETY, more than any other factor is scientifically linked to raising kids who live, love, and lead well. So it's important as the parents to learn emotional safety, so we can provide that for our kids as well. We mentioned that we went to Kids Blitz, here in Arizona. And it was a 6 hour training day for foster parents, and it was great! Chris and I learned about how kids organize, according to their surroundings - and to their guardians. If you are unstable as the guardian, children will not know how to organize and stay regulated around you. This prompted us to add a new element to our nightly routine of book reading/devotionals and prayer - bedtime ha

This week's episode features an interview with our son, Topher! He is 12 years old, and direct and brief with his answers! Which is why you get to enjoy a nice, short episode this week! In this episode we talked about: Baking! We made bagels from scratch and they were great! You can check out this recipe we used. But just a side note - she says to make 8 bagels - and I think we made about 12.  Foster kids sharing rooms. Here is a full article of requirements for parents who are considering foster care in Arizona. Different rules vary state to state, but they are very similar. In Arizona, children of opposite genders may share a room if they are under 6 years old. And foster parents may not share a room with their foster children. Just in case you were wondering. The Good Word of the Day: "Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God." - Philippians 4:5-6 This is Topher'