Dongtini

Simone gets her magician certification, Stephanie gushes about an Ethan Hawke movie, but not Ethan Hawke, and everyone is still worried about Richard Simmons.

Seasonal depression, social anxiety disorder, The Beaver Triology, and Dongs In The News™!

Kitten ownership, the Give Me Sex Jesus documentary, and Simone's blossoming magic career.

We talk mental health, Bono's assholery, and Dongs In The News™.

Ant-Man red carpet, emoji crimes, and Bernie Sanders is our boyfriend.

Simone's magic getaway, Stephy gets on Kelly Oxford's bad side, and Meatless Mondays.

Stephanie received a disgusting gift, Simone debuts a disgusting combination of words, and you should never google “squirt.”

The fall of the Duggars makes for 21 dongs and counting, the word “squirt” is gross but pretentious chocolate is delicious, and Stephy commiserates with Simone about memory hoarding.

Simone attends a special Mad Men finale event and gets a jarring breakfast, Stephy is better equipped to catch manipulation and delivers an exceptional dong in the news on a silver platter.

Simone had an emergency consult with the dong doctor, Stephy has glory hole information from a reputable source, and Simone was in a jury pool with a celebrity juror.

Simone reads a passive-aggressive letter from a super smug mom, Stephy’s house and car both broke at the same time, and Simone gifts a dog name to listeners.

We discuss dressgate, attention policing, and the purity of differing opinions.

Simone tried to look casual for Birdsworth to trick him to going to the vet, and Stephy really hates NPR.

The children's book The Rainbow Fish is dissected, Simone plans an intimate encounter with a platypus, and Stephy is surprised what her doctor finds her to be full of during her gyno exam.

Stephy draws the ire of progressive Christianity, Simone is validated in her Johnny Depp hate, and sex line instructions are read and ridiculed.

Stephy uses a bigger word than she needs to, Simone's word 'tomorrocado' gains wider acceptance, and you gotta hand it to Stephy for botching a first meeting with someone.

Simone slummed it in Hawaii for Christmas, Stephy isn't a big Christmas fan anymore, and a strange man with poor boundaries approached Simone to discuss penis enlargement surgery.

Simone's feathers are ruffled by the way Andrew WK addresses atheists, Stephy struggles with maths and conservative Thanksgiving. A battle with a cat is lost.

Simone says “The Room” is a perfect example of what happens when people don’t listen to others, and Stephy accidentally retweeted a pic of someone’s vag on SCCL.

Simone’s personality was assessed by a stranger, Stephy was propositioned by a gentleman lying on the sidewalk, and would you believe Simone was a debutante?