Life's A Pitch Podcast

This week we pitch some crime movies, as a reluctant group of time travelers unwittingly infiltrates a tournament to find the greatest historic criminal. Honourable Mentions: CSI Balamory - a body has washed up on the location of kids TV show "What's the Story in Balamory" but nobody seems to want to investigate. Can the actor playing PC Plum get to the bottom of this network coverup? The Budgie Smuggler - Being framed for smuggling was going to be the end of Mike Weekly's Olympic diving career, but the authorities involved in keeping budgie-based kaiju out of Japan want him to help them root out the heart of a smuggling operation in the heart of the Olympic village, all in his speedos! Can Mike survive life undercover with not much cover at all?

We pitch a Saturday morning tv hour in which we're all gaslighted into believing that cartoons can kill several people. We also talk about our experiences of Saturday Morning, and try to decode minion memes. These are deleted scenes from episode 338 of the Life's a Pitch podcast. If this is your first time listening, our advice is to listen to the main episode first, but you don't have to do what we tell you. Go wild.

This week we pitched some weird, wonderful, and nostalgic Saturday Morning Cartoons! Jane Whysics is one smart cookie, but when she accidentally solves a mysterious formula that an ancient scientist bound his soul into. As he does his best to help Jane get through the trials of high school, his cultural misunderstandings are sure to cause all sorts of high-jinks. Honourable Mentions: Li'l Daleks - The Doctor has decided it's time to show these baby killing machines just what life is like when you're not trying to exterminate everything in sight, but can they stay out of mischief long enough to learn any lessons? The Littlest Hooligan - Roger Kickem is a kid whose family don't give a damn about sports, culture or even looking out for him! They'd rather be fighting and smashing things up at every football away game. Roger, meanwhile is taking a tour of every new city he gets stranded in, and learning just enough to stop the Kickem family from causing absolute calamity.

You all know by now that if the Disness boys are on, you're getting a bumper (and very funny) series of deleted scenes. Enjoy us trying to figure out what a legend is, figuring out why Imhotep has bad eyesight, nerding out about novelisations, and just generally planning actual crimes. If this is your first time listening, you might find these out of context clips a little confusing. We reckon you should go back to the main episode (337) and things might make a (tiny) bit more sense.

This week we're joined by Jehan Ranasinghe and Dave Bulmer of Serious Disness to pitch some movies based on Myths and Legends. Jupiter, King of Gods, is renowned for his misogynist attitude and general being a real arse to women. So when the other gods conspire to cast him down into the form of a mortal fashion designer (Sandra Bullock) in 80s New Nork, he knows he's in trouble. He'll have to learn his lesson fast or get swept under in the fast paced and sexist world of city business! Honourable Mentions: King Arthur the Aardvark - A conspiracy in the late days of Albion leads to the Knights of the round table thinking their king has transformed into an Aardvark, meanwhile he's really been cast forward to a strange animated version of Canada, and Merlin really needs him back! Jason and Knuckles - Imagine Jason and the Argonauts, except Knuckles from the Sonic the Hedgehog series is there just solving all the problems by punching all the harpies and skeletons and such.

Benedict Cumberbatch stars as an icarian pub quiz hustler, who falls from grace only to plot revenge against Wetherspoons. We also talk about our favourite mockumentaries! These are deleted scenes from episode 336 of the Life's a Pitch Podcast, if this is your first time listening, we recommend you go back and listen to the main episode.

This week we pitch some monumental mockumentaries. A pair of disenfranchised workers at the Olympics make history when they break into the stadium at night, creating an Olympics for everyone. The Breathing Olympics. Honourable Mentions: Be My Mothman - When you become part of this dystopian reality TV show to date a cryptid, you know that each episode you stay in buys you only an extra time to live. But is there a way to tank this show permanently? Superhero Central - When one lottery winner (Peter Kay) decides to spend his winnings on a train station, he discovers a loophole in intellectual property law which means he can make the whole thing based on existing superheroes. Needless to say that the Brothers Warner aren't happy about it. Follow this man on his enduring campaign to bring new joy to rail travel.

We pitch something that absolutely cannot be described as a historical drama, as the CIA tries to undermine a happy socialist monarchy for the exploitable resource of Christmas Spirit. We also discuss period drama, and our experience of learning history. These are deleted scenes from episode 335 of the Life's a Pitch Podcast, if this is your first time listening, we reccomend you go back and listen to the main episode.

We pitch some historical dramas which are definitely very accurate, and we ABSOLUTELY did not forget that Panama was a country, it was all definitely jokes. In the midst of prohibition, the Panama family is trying to get their Florida Swamp Gin to Los Angeles, but the police are blocking the way overland. There's only one thing for it, and that's to dig a little canal in a big continent using the power of Gaters. Honourable Mentions: The Great Flyer of London - When architect Samuel Pepys' passion project goes too far, his political literature will serve as the kindling for great disaster. All it takes is a spark. The Battle of Five Trainee Knights and Eleven Angry Pigs - An untold Arthurian Legend, when five new prospective members of the round table were given a simple training task, what they didn't realise was that their intended quarry was a metaphor, literally.

We pitch a movie about a chosen one, then talk about how much we dislike the chosen one trope. These are deleted scenes from the Life's a Pitch Podcast episode 334, if this is your first time listening, we recommend you go back and listen to the original episode.

As part of our young adult fantasy episode, high school drama is brought into chaos when a magic potion brewed by a misanthropic is mistaken for alcohol and used to spike the punch, leaving all the kids with superpowers. Honourable Mentions: Pixies, Princesses and Prom - A series of shorts set over the course of a single day, in which fantasy leaks into reality. A nerd accidentally asks a wish-granting spirit to be his date, and ends up with a dangerously manic pixie dream girl. A jock drives to his girlfriend's house to meet her dad, only to find that he's a deadly Shark/Dragon. Look What I Found in the Garbage Can Today - A mysterious alien creature falls into the life of young Elliot, but he realises only too late that it's sugar and only sugar that drives this little goblin fiend.

We discuss board game and toy movies, pitch a movie in which Gary Lineker curses some children to be shrunk into subbuteo pieces for stealing his crisps, and figure out some things about Dracula, the Sylvanian families, Dune, the 'Hot Loop' in Home Alone, and more! These are some of the deleted scenes from episode 333 of the Life's a Pitch podcast. If you want context or if it's your first time listening, we recommend you go back and listen to the main episode first.

In this episode about Toy and Game spinoffs, we're joined by Dave Bulmer to pitch a sad tale of exploitation and small victories in "The Ballad of Stretch Armstrong" Honourable Mentions: Connect 4: The Elements - In a world where everything is run by various combinations of elements, experimenting with new combinations can be dangerous. After a prank goes awry seemingly leading to the loss of power across the nation, one teenager must try to put the pieces back together. Sylvanian Families and the Deforestation Crisis - The Sylvanian families are struggling to stop Donald Trunk and his family from exploiting the forest's natural resources. When Sylvanians start to go missing, the families of the forest must stray out further than they've ever gone before, and discover a truth about themselves that puts their very existence into question

We pitch a terrifying new brand of Beatle-Mania, talk about how we "might" have written a fan into existence, and have an "exclusive" "interview" with "Roland Emerich" These are the deleted scenes from Episode 332 of the Life's a Pitch Podcast, if you want context for these clips, we recommend you go back and listen to the main episode.

Breaking news on the podcast this week: Disaster Movies! When disaster after disaster strikes planet earth, humanity persists, but only the media can stop The Never-Ending Goodbye. It all goes a little off the rails, honestly. Honourable Mentions: Let it Snow - A world covered in snow, no end in sight, but one old videotape of a Frank Sinatra Vegas performance could provide a clue to this endless winter, and some dark magical deals. Exploding Pants? - A 'sponsored' segment from MiPantis, providing good things to put on your bum. Don't question it, Don't use anyone else's code. Revere the crystal fortress, but only use the correct door.

It's every collector's dream and nightmare at the same time. After the pope cancels easter, it's discovered that there's only one creme egg left in existence, Can Rory the Corner Shop owner and confectionary apocalypse prepper keep his prize safe without turning to violence? No. We also discuss Star Trek, the OC and sequel naming conventions for some reason. This is a collection of deleted scenes from the Life's a Pich podcast episode 331, if this is your first time listening, we recommend you go back and check out the main episode to give this one some context.

When it comes to food, only one band can provide your own, personal, pizza. This is a definitely accurate biopic about the creation of Depeche Mode, the band from Stoke-on-Trent who rose to fame through their culinary skills. Honourable Mentions: I left my recipe on Treasure Island - After reminiscing with his pal the Swedish Chef on a sparsely populated Muppets Treasure Island reunion, Kevin Bishop begins trying to reclaim a meatball pie recipe he can barely remember, on a journey to an island he'll wish he could forget. The Epic Bacon Movie - When one group of YouTubers accidentally add a mysterious ingredient to one of their "epic" bacon food stunts, they face something far more terrifying than a living golem of salted meat. They face confronting their own insecurities.

We talk about our favourite conspiracy theories, an Ari Aster film with very life's a pitch vibes, and pitch a film about hedgehogs! Enjoy!

This week we delve into the world of conspiracy theories and unexplained mysteries as famous pilot Amelia Earhart goes in search of... the Infinite Flat Earth!! Honourable Mentions: Pet the Mantis: We get a deep insight into how a new pope is chosen. President Antichrist: Brendan Fraser struggles to end the world, and make his parents proud after becoming president.

Donkey Kong has gone back in time to his first incarnation, but this time the evil King K Rool has everyone in the factory fooled with his crown. In this WHOLE EPISODE LENGTH deleted scenes, we also: discuss Dave's favourite video game movie adaptation, "The Mario Film"! (Super Mario Brothers: the Movie)and get all passionate about what makes a good adaptation. These are deleted scenes from the Life's a Pitch Podcast episode 329, if this is your first time listening, you might want to go back and listen to the main episode to get some context for these bonus bits!