Mystic Pizza Minute

In our twenty-seventh Minute, Daisy drunkenly recites her insecurities on the docks as a sperm-like shooting star passes silently overhead. Your Mystic Pizza Copilots welcome David's little brother Josh into their cockpit, leading the audience on an aerial tour of dickish pizza opinions, wishing life-hacks, and terrible helicopter sound effects. David's cat throws up. Special Guest: Joshua Hulford

In our twenty-sixth Minute, the ladies of Mystic Pizza gather under cover of darkness on the local docks, where Daisy acquires a damp six-pack and commiserates with Jojo about Bill's sexy thicc wrists. Hosts John Windsor and David Hulford, along with guest Alex Colic, delve into a variety of topics including but not limited to Sri Lankan coconut retrieval, butt privilege, and the unrefined pre-micro-brewery beer landscape of the late eighties. Special Guest: Alex Colic

In our twenty-fifth Minute, Tim Travers finishes telling Kat the tragic tale of Elias Mantrose, who may haunt the very balcony on which they stand, before we cut to Kat, Jojo, and Daisy hanging out in the dark on a recently renamed boat. Your Mystic tour guides are joined by a new guest, Alex Colic, with whom they share the details of a new dumb bet Windsor made, an early draft of a spooky Mystic Pizza fan theory, and a long rambling conversation about the state of the competing Marvel cinematic universes. Special Guest: Alex Colic

In our twenty-fourth Minute, hot local dad Tim Travers gives Kat her babysitter retainer before taking her on a romantic fake-history tour of Elias Mantrose's 19th century estate, during which Kat tells Tim where she'd like to stick her telescope. Your pizza pals are joined once more by Addison Davis, and the three have a chat about guerrilla bread art, Men in Black era Vincent D'Onofrio's saggy skin, and the surprising connection between fashion trends and economic conditions. Special Guest: Addison Davis

In our twenty-third Minute, it's bring-your-daughter-to-work day in Mystic, with Kat taking Phoebe to visit her father at the house he's working on and storing mysterious sandwiches within. Hulford and Windsor welcome a new guest, Addison Davis, and discuss the evolution of their podcast's theme song, strange museum exhibits, and Drexel University's cruel homeless starving policy. Windsor reads some bad Amazon reviews of the questionably-appropriate-for-children children's book Babar's Little Girl. Special Guest: Addison Davis

In our twenty-second Minute, the bar scene finally, finally ends, and Daisy shows off her new dress to her sister Kat. Your hosts Scrunch Crumbat and Scrunch Crumbat are joined by Scrunchette Crumbat, and have a crumbatastic discussion about the sexless-deathtrap that is after-prom, hiding dirty drawings from your stepdad, and what outfits they'd like to be buried in. Special Guest: Dominique Holland

In our twenty-first Minute, Daisy sinks shot after shot, and the yuppies prepare to leave the Peg Leg Pub, finally bringing the pool montage to a close. In this special fourth of July episode, Windsor and Hulford are joined last minute by returning guest Dominique Holland, discussing the proper care of linen pants, the history of billiards movies, and the hellish, Arli$$-filled landscape that was pre-Oz HBO. Special Guest: Dominique Holland

In our twentieth Minute, the endless billiards montage continues. Sweeps week comes to a disastrous conclusion with Windsor spending the entire episode talking in an impeccable Australian accent, Hulford sitting in the world's squeakiest chair, and returning guest/producer Steve mostly left powerless to keep us on topic, rather than going off on tangents about saying terribly strange things to women, 311 cruises, and prison gang bars... Maybe listen to this one while vacuuming! Special Guest: Steve Richardson

In our nineteenth Minute, Daisy and the group of yuppie interlopers have themselves a little billiards montage. It's sweeps week on the Mystic Pizza Minute, and Hulford and Windsor are joined by returning guest/producer/designated driver Steve Richardson, who engage in a 'lively' discussion about Memorial Day bus schedules, the differences between dusters, trench coats, and peacoats, and the exciting season four finale of Game of Thrones. Special Guest: Steve Richardson

In our eighteenth Minute, in an incredible upset CHET MISSES THE THIRD DART! And then moves right along to involving Daisy in a game of sexy billiards. Your pizza boys and special guest Marshall ask the important questions, such as is Tony Hawk nice? Is the ideal man one who takes control AND says just what he means? And why don't they teach posture in school anymore? Special Guest: Marshall Bruno

In our seventeenth Minute, the yet unnamed head yuppie character makes a bullseye, takes a shot, makes another bullseye, takes another shot, and then... Windsor and Hulford meet Marshall Bruno, and tell him about a dumb bet Windsor made, while also discussing the art of foley, changing eyebrow styles, and engage in some dream casting for "Livin' La Vida Loco: The Ricki Martin Story." Special Guest: Marshall D. Bruno

In our super sweet sixteenth Minute, a group of yuppie white wine drinkers make themselves at home in Mystic's famously grimy Peg Leg Pub, as Daisy and Jo quietly observe. Windsor and Hulford are joined once more by resident paranormal linguistics expert Caitlin Fontecchio, and the three reminisce about their crappy cars of yesteryear, false implanted Street Shark memories, and horse fleshlights. Special Guest: Caitlin Fontecchio

In our fifteenth Minute, Jo and Bill take Daisy to a bar, are accosted by some of Mystic's many terrible people outside, and then get serious. H&W are joined this Minute by linguistics expert Caitlin Fontecchio, and have a round table discussion about making out at the mall, losing limbs at sea, and artistic works set in Media, Pennsylvania. Special Guest: Caitlin Fontecchio

In our fourteenth Minute, Kat totally aces the world's easiest job interview and we are briefly introduced to the colorful Peg Leg Pub. Windsor and Hulford welcome back special guest Yossi Wilson, bicker about the show's opening, speculate about the flavor of hundred-year-old koi, and express bafflement at Mystic Pizza character Phoebe's bizarre headwear for the third episode in a row. Special Guest: Yossi Wilson

In our lucky thirteenth Minute, Kat meets her would be ward, Phoebe, and reads to her a very sad children's book while her dad takes an emergency architect call. Windsor and Hulford welcome another new guest, Yossi Wilson, and the three chat amicably about glass bricks, velveeta rabbits, and the difference between nautical and regular ol' telescopes. Special Guest: Yossi Wilson

In our dozenth Minute, Kat meets her potential employer, area hot single dad Tim Travers, and the two bond over counterfeit antique telescopes. Your humble hosts, Winnie and the Incredible Hulf, engage their research-laden special guest in a thoughtful discussion of the conniving famous movie producer Samuel Goldwyn and Yale's class of '79. Finally Windsor presents us with a valuable public service announcement about everything pizzas. Special Guest: Dominique Holland

In our eleventh Minute, Kat drops off lunch for her mother and her mother's rowdy coworkers, then jets off to a mysteriously colored house of unknown occupancy. Windsor and Hulford welcome their newest guest yet, Dominique Holland, and the lot of them chat about flash mob promposals, St. Vitus' dance, and the blinding whiteness of Mystic, Connecticut. Special Guest: Dominique Holland

In our tenth Minute, Kat takes her motor scooter on a whirlwind tour of Mystic, culminating in a thrilling pizza delivery to her mother. Your loyal hosts and their most special of guests examine this scene from every angle, and then some, discussing bathroom upkeep, the beauty that is the Pequot language, and the latest lobster worker fashions. Special Guest: John Werner

In our ninth Minute, Bill and Jo make out in broad daylight, as Kat and Daisy arrange a pizza delivery to their mother. Hulford and Windsor welcome another new guest, John Werner, who brings with him tales of the Yale-area pizza tradition, as well as a lot of interesting theories about the color-coded cosmic significance of hand-modified Slice of Heaven t-shirts. First, however, they launch into a long discussion about Lord of the Rings immediately after expressing a shared disinterest in the topic. Special Guest: John Werner

In our eighth Minute, would be newlyweds Bill and Jo are chased from the titular pizza parlour by rude townies, and share a big wet sloppy kiss. Your loyal Pizza Mystics and special guest, William Ballbert, have a rap session about hobby store oversaturation, regional sandwich terminology, and maybe even make some future field trip plans... Special Guest: Will Ball