Chris Locurto: Entrepreneur, Leadership Coach, Life Strategy, Blogger

How has examining victim mentality changed or challenged your thinking?Exposing the lies and combating them with the truth will help us to live a life that’s healthy and full of meaning. Victim mentality is just one way that we can rob ourselves of that better life.And while we’ve probably all “played the victim” card - more than a few times - it can be really tough to see when we’re being a bully. Now, you may be thinking, but I’m a nice person, I’d never hurt a fly… Well, let’s walk though this a bit.Everyone goes through seasons in life when insecurities drive them to make poor choices, to lean into others, or even push them around. We’ve all been there, especially when we lose our sense of worth or we wrestle with unhealthy behavior patterns.Think about it. No one is immune to the weights, wounds, and disappointments of life. Have you ever put pressure on someone else to get your own way?Have you ever used emotions, words, or actions to get others to conform?Have you ever uncovered someone else’s weakness

Have you ever played the “victim-card”? I’m sure that we all have at one time or another. Why? We’ve all been duped into believing some of the Lies Victims Tell Themselves. Here’s the deal, we all struggle with untrue recorded memos in our heads, whether about ourselves or other people, and those recordings are often set to repeat on endless loops. These untruths, or lies, that we tell ourselves usually manifest in two distinct ways: encouraging us to act as innocent victims or evil villains. Acting out, in either way, can be really unhealthy!On today’s episode, we’re going to take some time to examine our lives and make sure that we’re living authentically by learning to interrupt these distorted thought patterns. So, what’s the first step? We’ve got to recognize the lies holding us back from embracing the good life we’re meant to live! I’m sure you’re acquainted with at least a few of these:I’m not good enoughI’ll never measure upEveryone’s against meIt’s not (ever) my fault!My life is just a messLife is ou

Have you ever played the “victim-card”? I’m sure that we all have at one time or another. Why? We’ve all been duped into believing some of the Lies Victims Tell Themselves. Here’s the deal, we all struggle with untrue recorded memos in our heads, whether about ourselves or other people, and those recordings are often set to repeat on endless loops. These untruths, or lies, that we tell ourselves usually manifest in two distinct ways: encouraging us to act as innocent victims or evil villains. Acting out, in either way, can be really unhealthy!On today’s episode, we’re going to take some time to examine our lives and make sure that we’re living authentically by learning to interrupt these distorted thought patterns. So, what’s the first step? We’ve got to recognize the lies holding us back from embracing the good life we’re meant to live! I’m sure you’re acquainted with at least a few of these:I’m not good enoughI’ll never measure upEveryone’s against meIt’s not (ever) my fault!My life is just a messLife is ou

Ever get that sneaking suspicion that not everyone on the team is fully onboard with where you’re going as a company? It’s more common than you might think!Getting others to buy-in to your vision is a challenge, but it’s not impossible and it can be highly rewarding! Can you imagine what it would be like for your team to become fully engaged?There’s nothing like having your entire company owning the vision and running with it!Imagine the possibilities! But that’s not where most business owners are. Sadly, most struggle to “convince” their teams of the destination and the best way to get there. That’s what we want to discuss today. In this episode, Brian and Joel take a stab at what it takes to develop a culture of community and commitment around the goals you’ve set.Here’s the deal: if your team can’t see how they’re connected to the vision, they’ll be reluctant to own their part in it. It won’t make sense to them. And they won’t be able to help you achieve it.But, if they’re connected, committed, and coopera

No matter what industry your business is in, you’ve likely got customers or clients that you have to interact with. But, how do you know if you’re really connecting with them?Do you know their needs, wants, or desires? Sure, maybe you do your fair share of market research, but do you have a connection with your clients that goes beyond the statistics? Have you developed a relationship, as much as possible in your field, that helps you intuitively anticipate their needs, even their motives, for buying your products or hiring your services?For some business owners, a client can become little more than a number; a means to a profitable end. Well, hopefully profitable. But, in our experience, this approach backfires!If you’ve ever found yourself seeing clients this way, then it probably wasn’t too long before you discovered that the ends don’t justify the means, at least not in the long run. Your relationship with your customer is the primary lifeline you have to a healthy and profitable future. Here’s the deal:

You probably use some kind of Job Description in your recruiting and hiring processes, right? But, what are you using in order to keep your team members on track once they're on board? Maybe you’ve had your folks ask questions like: “Am I doing a good job”, “Am I doing the right things”, or “What would you want me to do differently”? These are great questions!But what they indicate is that your process is missing something important. Enter KRAs.Maintaining excellence, holding folks accountable to goals, and coaching them towards higher performance requires something more than just task lists and project assignments.That’s why we talk so much about KRAs, or Key Result Areas. In fact, we do tons of coaching and training along this line in order to help leaders discover the benefits of this tool.So, from time to time, we like to revisit this topic and tease out different aspects that we haven’t covered before, as well as help people to see what they’re missing out on.KRAs, which are sometimes referred to as Key

How would you rate yourself as a communicator on a scale of 1 to 10?Most of the time, leaders and their teams think they’re doing just fine. However, most are seriously mistaken!After a careful assessment of team dynamics and interpersonal communication among leaders and team members, we discover time after time that quality communication is missing.High levels of quality communication can be your team’s greatest asset, while the lack of this kind of communication - at high levels - can absolutely be your greatest liability. There’s just no way around it. The number #1 issue that we see holding leaders and teams back from greater unity and greater growth is a LACK of high quantities of high quality communication. There are several reasons that leaders tend to get held back in this area: things like fear, anxiety, stress, poor processes and time management being among the top contenders. Communication, we discover, is also a risky business. There are so many things that can go wrong, including losing face as a

How do you know if your coping skills are actually helping you in life or holding you back?There are different kinds of coping skills or strategies. For example, some focus on emotions, some on problems, some help us to disconnect from stressful circumstances, and others are basically social or religious support systems. And these things aren’t bad, I mean, they might actually help you to get you through a crisis or two… but are they a good long-term strategy? Well, not if they don’t address the problem! While they might help us to feel better in the short run, masking our real feelings and emotions does little to empower us to understand what’s happening (and why) in the long run.Think about it. Counting to ten, taking a walk in a park, stopping a moment to pray, and even cleaning or organizing a messy room may help us avoid lashing out in anger or breaking down in tears. But if that’s all we’re doing, then we’re not actually dealing with the underlying cause.On today’s episode, I sit down with Brian as he a

You were created to grow, thrive, and flourish. You weren’t created to barely get by, wander aimlessly through life, or just maintain the status quo. In fact, that’s contrary to your very design!In fact, when we’re not doing what we’re created to do, fulfilling our God-given purpose and growing into what He created us to be, then we’ll have a hard time enjoying life to its fullest.Viktor Frankl said, When a person can't find a deep sense of meaning, they distract themselves with pleasure. But, that pleasure is often temporary, and serves only to distract us from purpose.But things like joy, fulfillment, and growth are not necessarily easy to find. In fact, obtaining a deep sense of purpose takes time: it takes deliberate effort and developmental growth.Today, we want to dig into the soil of one of your core needs: to grow, thrive, and flourish as God created you to. And the story of our growth as human beings began in a garden, long ago.In that garden, God gave Adam and Eve work to do, things to enjoy, as wel

Should I stay or should I go? That can be a loaded question when it comes to employment.It’s no secret, transitions are stressful, especially when looking to change jobs. And, knowing how to leave a dead-end job, the right way and at the right time, can be a real challenge.Statistically, this is one of the most pressing questions in today’s workplace. However, with so many jobs available, how do you know when to make a change or even if you should?Where I live, in Middle Tennessee, there are wanted signs everywhere I look. And, I don't mean a search for on-the-run criminals, haha! I’m talking about employers ready to hire workers!On the podcast today, I want to walk you through a process of assessment of yourself, as well as your situation, in order to accurately discern if you’re ready for this kind of transition.You don’t have to stay stuck in a role or at a company where you don’t fit, and now may be the perfect time to prepare yourself for what’s coming up next in life. Let’s get to work!Enjoy today’s epi

Today we’re learning why character counts, and why it gets discounted so quickly. In modern culture, character is one of the last virtues to get noticed, even though it's responsible for the rise (and fall) of many. From preachers to politicians to parents and business CEOs, character matters.Without character you won’t last, but that’s not to say that it’s the easier path. Far from it. The road to character is an upward climb; it’s the narrower path, the one less traveled. And yet, it’s the surest way to longevity and, quite frankly, sanity in a world gone mad.Character is like the DNA coding of your unique soul. Your mind, will, and emotions are all responsible for contributing to and creating the components of your character.Around here, we like to say that character is who you are when no one else is looking. And while that’s true, it also bleeds into everything else that you say and do, regardless of who’s around. Whether you know that someone’s watching you or not, your character is hard at work.Charact

Have you ever felt a slight hesitation before confronting a team member, coworker, or even a family member on a goal that they set or a commitment that they made? I think we all have. What’s that tinge of uncertainty or anxiety pointing us to? It’s probably something from our Root System that’s afraid of a negative outcome, the possibility of conflict, or something worse.And while we’ve all seen it abused, when we truly understand what real accountability is, it can become something that’s helpful, healthy, and even life-giving. It’s necessary for growth!On today’s podcast, I want to take a deep dive into the Risks and Rewards of holding others accountable. Now, let me clarify what I mean by “holding others accountable”. This is so important to understand: accountability means lovingly helping others to succeed. That’s it. Not as heavy as you thought, right? That’s because we’ve all got examples in our lives when others held us accountable, but their intentions were… well, neither loving nor helpful.But, if y

Feeling stuck or out of control with your finances? You’re not alone. That’s why these three rules for changing your financial trajectory are so important.When you really think about it, what do you imagine is currently holding you back from reaching your desired financial destination? Is it that debt that you just can’t seem to get rid of? Do you feel like you never get the traction that you need towards your goals?Is it that dreaded budget conversation with a spouse or business partner that you just don’t want to have? Don’t let a sense of helplessness or hopelessness keep you from making the changes necessary to change the direction of your finances! Whatever’s holding you back, I promise you that there’s a way through the decision-making maze to get you where you want to go. Sometimes, a little nudge can go a long way towards making that dream a reality. On today’s show, Joel, Brian, and I discuss three rules to help nudge you - or push if necessary - to help you get unstuck and on your way today.Enjoy th

You’ve probably encountered a roadblock like this before. The person on the other end of line or behind the plexiglass partition, a person responsible for “serving customers” and resolving problems, says something to the effect of “No ma’am, I’m sorry, that’s just not our policy, or I can’t help you with that, or no we don’t do it that way.”Whatever happened to the idea of customer service? It can easily get limited by processes.You likely didn’t feel well served or like your problem was addressed at that moment. In general, businesses offer products and/or services that help to resolve the problems of others. They try to make their lives better, easier, and more enjoyable. But, it doesn’t always work out that way.Sometimes we encounter the policies, procedures, and processes of businesses that make them unable to provide the resolve that we’re after. We can feel stuck and even out of control. Maybe we end up frustrated, with no one to appeal to. And what comes next is less than ideal.Then we’ll likely try to

When’s the last time you came across a really well-oiled machine?Well, you might not have even known it was there! Yup, and that’s kind of the point. Processes blending seamlessly into the structure that they serve and support is a beautiful thing.It’s really only when we run into a process that’s out of date or out of touch that we recognize there’s something that’s wrong with the picture. In today’s episode, we want to talk about the positive side of processes, the side that has the potential to catapult your business forward.If information and communication are the central nervous system of your organization, then process and procedure are its spine, giving it structure and stability.We create and implement processes in our businesses that give form and structure, but also extend the capacity of our team! At the same time, we scrutinize these processes relentlessly as soon as they stop delivering the results that we want!Here’s the deal: all things change, your clients’ needs change, your team members chan

Look, don’t take this personally, ok?Sounds like good advice, right? But how many times have you been able to follow it? We tend to look at things that are going on around us as if they're actually happening to us.When we're struggling, we can be pretty quick to be the victim, and slow to take responsibility.To make matters worse, there are all kinds of things from our past, buried in our Root System, that come to the surface whenever we’re “triggered”. Instantly, a specific trauma or situation from our past is relived. Have you ever taken criticism poorly, and then had one or more of these reactions?Your self-worth felt jeopardizedYou retreated into victim mentalityYou held onto it like it was an insultFelt like your character was being attackedYour mind couldn’t let it go. And why is that?Taking things personally creates a negative feedback loop that’s tough to break out of.Ideally, we should take a more objective stance; one that’s open-hearted and appropriate to whatever situation we find ourselves in. Ho

Ever get the feeling that your workload is following you home at the end of the day? It might even take on a presence, like a little lost puppy. And if you decide to feed it, oh geez, you might never get rid of it! Taking your work home from the office can quickly get out of control.Nowadays, it takes discipline and intentionality to separate yourself from your work, especially if your work is done at your home office. I mean, it’s hard to find the boundaries, determine the cut off point, and find space to actually disconnect and rest.Whether or not you have the luxury of a traditional commute to and from your workplace, technology makes it all too easy to blur the lines between the home and office.Meanwhile, your mental and physical health can suffer, relationships get taxed, and stress levels on all sides of the equation can start to rise.Borders and boundaries can be incredibly helpful in identifying where work and home begin and end, but the reality is that these two often overlap. Definition and clarity

Wanted: looking for someone to lead a confident, creative, and highly effective team of people. Would you apply for that job? Well, you can actually have that kind of a team, as well as other tangible and measurable benefits, but you just have to do one thing to get it. Leaders who train their teams well, investing time and resources, reap the rewards!People are your greatest asset as a leader, and the role of the leader is to lead your team to success, not the other way around. So, why do so many leaders struggle here?Oh there’s a whole list of reasons… From time crunches to Crazy Cycles, from misplaced priorities to misallocated resources, we’ve heard it all when leading leaders and business owners through their strategic planning event in our offices. And it’s painful to see them stuck!I can tell you that most leaders struggle with pushing through this barrier, and rarely get to see what’s on the other side, without some outside help. But until they start training their teams well, they’ll never get to the

We’ve probably all felt that tension in a relationship at least once, right? Someone appears to be calm and agreeable, and yet they’re trying to control you or the situation at the same time. In fact, if we’re honest, we’ve even been that person!Well, we’ve had this question pop up from time to time, and so we wanted to tackle it head on: can someone be both submissive and controlling at the same time? Yes, absolutely.There’s some frustration here, agitation, and maybe even a little manipulation. I mean, people are people, we’re all human, and at times we can get a little controlling and self-centered. Healthy roles with accountability are life-giving and will help us avoid getting stuck relationally!So, we want to be able to recognize this activity, identifying it even in ourselves, so that we can respond to it maturely, with humility and respect, safeguarding ourselves and the relationship. If we’re successful here in bringing balance and proper alignment to our relationships, we’ll enjoy fewer breakdowns,