Something Something Joystick

This week, we don our Xmas sweater/s and share mirth, good cheer, and some good ol' fashioned family fun! We talk about gifts, Jesus, PlayStation All-Stars: Battle Royale, Dishonored, The Unfinished Swan, Christmas drugs, a cameo appearance from Papa Sanderson, Need For Speed: Hot Pursuit, friend of the podcast Luke Milton, Gravity Rush, gifts (again), ex-girlfriends, and the Electric Light Orchestra.In SSST: THQ files for bankruptcy. More Earthbound on the horizon. Minecraft: The Story of Mojang comes out soon.In Ask SSJ: we stage a radio nativity play, drink eggnog for the first time, and discuss Aladdin 3, dinosaurs and ice cream, Batman vs Genghis Khan, Santa as an RPG character, penis fingers, teachers, punk rock, vending machines, Neil Armstrong, Jeff Wayne's Musical Version of War Of The Worlds, 2001: A Space Odyssey, and then a patented SSJ Actually Serious Ethical Discussion about killing animals, respect for death, and hypocrisy; Santa's judgmental criteria, and Axe Cop (my memor

This week, we welcome 'drinks bitch' and background-giggler Ree Mansell to share the delight of our 2nd annual Game Of The Year Edition! We celebrate the new year with our year-end lists - but first, we discuss Auld Lang Syne, SSJ action figures, crackling, the year 2022, truck driving, plinths, Half-Life 3, the Nintendo 4DS, Haley Joel Osment, VB, Wreck-It Ralph, Skrillex, the Spruce Goose, a Pretty English Girl, and dub Tom "the Batman of masturbating in public". We also wrap up the year in console releases, the Kickstarter revolution, and some titles which just missed out on our best-of lists.Then we really kick it into gear, with our lists for:Best Podcast Discoveries of 2012Best VisualsBest Sound & MusicBest Gameplay.Then we tease you just a little longer by answering some viewer mail in a segment we like to call Ask SSJ!Then it's finally time for our grand List Of All Lists: Best Games of 2012!Huge congratulations, love and respect to all the award-winners of this year.MUSIC USED:SSJ Theme 2: X

This week, it's really late, we've been away all week, and I'm sick, but we still manage to put out a podcast! We talk about impressions of each other, dominance, shortbread, the history of the earth (and the last few days), Adelaide, my future juice wife, The Walking Dead, Manos: The Hands of Fate, Assassin's Creed III, and Slayer.In SSST: Nintendo announces Pokémon X and Pokémon Y, Sony ceases production of the PlayStation 2 (so we take a look back at the console's greatest hits and misses), and Namco announce their plans to open a high-end gaming restaurant. Also we get lots of yelling done.In Ask SSJ: We discuss console lifespans and the future of this console generation, before taking some questions from the net... and to be honest, there were too many to count this week, and I am lazy. :D I think I remember singing a bunch of Clash and Queen songs towards the end?MUSIC USED:SSJ Theme 2: Xavier Rubetzki NoonanLook Back: 2NRO8OT / CC BY-NC-SA 3.0Trick and/or Treat (the candy raid is on!): N

This week, it's been just a few days since we last recorded, so we haven't got much to talk about. But we still manage to stretch this episode out for over 100 minutes, so there ya go. We talk about cheerful welcomes, heavy drinking, artistic nudity, Halle Berry, violent love, children's books, a Guinness lighter, teamwork, Bad News Bears, The Love Boat, Mad Men (note - slight spoilers), Assassin's Creed III, passive gameplay, and body image.In SSST: Zip. Nada. Zilch.In Ask SSJ: we cover a bumper crop of your delightful listener mail! We talk about body-swaps, great console design, obscure Simpsons references, sex with pavlovas, and women we'd like to marry, as well as WAY WAY WAY more. Huge thanks go to Tweeters @ReeMansell and @GrotesqueSavior (#GargoyleJuan), Official Botheree Of The Show Luke Milton, friends of the show Alexei Toliopoulos and Lee Sullivan,  and Juans such as Hugo, Clarrie, Michael, Dylan, Cameron, Katy, Ephy and Eliza!MUSIC USED:SSJ Theme 2: Xavier Rubetzki NoonanCosmi

This week, we talk about The Situation, mouth-jousting, continuity errors, the departure of Official Wife of the Podcast Maude Garrett, party pie etiquette, an update on recording women while they sleep, love on the seven seas, comic books, the Journey demo, The Walking Dead, Saints Row: The Third, Retro City Rampage, save points in real life, extra lives, Max Payne 3, Vanquish, and Red Dead Revolver.In SSST: Atari files for bankruptcy, Sony says they'll wait for Microsoft to talk next-gen consoles first, The Walking Dead is classified for release in Australia, THQ is dissolved and we talk about the fallout, and a billion announcements from Nintendo: new Zelda, old Zelda, new Smash Bros... it's enough to make a Very Cranky Sandsky!MUSIC USED:SSJ Theme 2: Xavier Rubetzki NoonanDo I: Fun MachineWith Her Shadow: Born RuffiansBackwards Party: GunfaceCLICK HERE to download!CITIZENS OF GOTHAM...Add Xavier on PSN and XBL: xavierrnAdd Sandsky on XBL and PSN: colourfastFREE ADVICE: Don't try and watch a season of

This week, we talk about audible faces (and the 'upstairs perineum'), time-wasting, the worlds of professional wrestling and k-pop, Silver Linings Playbook, Dungeons & Dragons, 'the Iron Chef of taxidermists', upcoming guests, the 'Bubcast', the solar plexus, and tequila.In What We've Been Playing: crying whilst playing PlayStation All-Stars: Battle Royale, clever gameplay in Ni No Kuni, the joys of freemium done right with Pixel People, and the bitterness of misspent potential with Dust 541... and tequila.In SSST: the future of the Ouya brand is revealed, we anticipate Assassin's Creed IV, Rayman Legends is delayed and will now be multi-platform, Impossible Studios disbands after just six months, Ninja Gaiden 3: Razor's Edge is also no longer a Wii U exclusive, and J.J. Abrams is in talks with Valve to make a Half-Life or Portal movie.In Ask SSJ: Dickens, UFOs, Letterman, the future of consoles and PCs, some prime examples of the drunken expulsion of toxins, gossip, sentient super-com

This week, we talk about Little Orphan Annie, Star Trek: The Next Generation, pop rocks, robot God,  pretty ladies, slim gyms, and Richard Nixon. We then sit down for a little bit of much-needed therapy. Then we talk about My Bloody Valentine, Ni No Kuni, unnecessary touching, Silver Linings Playbook, Datura, Sony's big 'Future of PlayStation' event, and we tease our appearance on the Gaming Cult Podcast (!), and our upcoming appearance on The Book Was Better (!!), before launching into our Peanut Gallery review of Movie 43. (!!!)In SSST: PS4 rumours, The Last of Us delays, new boob physics in Dead Or Alive 5, Mortal Kombat: Komplete Edition coming to Australia, new Arkham game coming this year, Take-Two buys the WWE license, Nintendo announce several release dates as well as new titles Mario & Luigi: Dream Team and Mario Golf World Tour, and Australian retailer David Jones plans to quit the video game-sellin' business.MUSIC USED:SSJ Theme 2: Xavier Rubetzki NoonanSo Lon

This week, we discuss the outer reaches of the universe, the impact of drugs, the übermensch, the Love Boat, Rosemary's Baby, video game retailing, therapy, Datura, Sonic's backstory, Dune, a threesome with Carly Rae Jepsen and Taylor Swift, after-school care, and energy drinks.In SSST: we're all about that PS4! We talk about the possibilities of the console and its software, analyse Sony's announce event part-by-part, and compare it to other console launches in the past and the future. Fuckin' yeah!In Ask SSJ: we answer #GargoyleJuan's question about music in video games - what makes it memorable, and what current soundtracks will be remembered in the future?MUSIC USED:SSJ Theme 2: Xavier Rubetzki NoonanRez: Sidabitball / CC BY-NC-ND 2.0Happy: GunfaceCLICK HERE to download!I USED TO PLAY THE GUITAR... NOW I PLAY THE BASS.Add Sandsky on XBL and PSN: colourfastAdd Xavier on PSN and XBL: xavierrnFREE ADVICE: When your podcast has its 64th episode, try and remember to do that 'NINTENDO SIXTY-FOOOUUUUUR' imp

This week, fan favourite Alexei Toliopoulos returns, and we talk about marketing tactics, mathematics, dogs, Hitchcock, surnames, talking landmarks, therapy, and Jaws. We sit down and talk about recent developments with my emotional/mental problems, then get derailed and talk about Elton John, marriage proposals, Bing, the movie Prime, 'slizz', Alexei's job entertaining children, One Direction, Bioshock, Devil May Cry, Crysis 3, Mass Effect, and The Walking Dead.In SSST: we talk about The Band, the newly announced Assassin's Creed IV: Black Flag, Kellee Santiago joining the Ouya dev team, Riot Games' new Sydney studio, the mysterious silence surrounding Star Wars 1313, impressions (including my never-before-heard impression of Sandsky), Neil Armstrong, Adele, Anne Hathaway, Sweeney Todd, and Daniel-Day Lewis.In Ask SSJ: we field questions regarding my laziness, Witcher 2, internet culture, games we would make, video game movies we'd like to see, and Sim death. Big ups to Eoghan, William, Taylor

This week, we’re joined by the extremely funny Alexei Toliopoulos for our marathon Halloween special! We talk about aging, masturbation, dick band-aids, hairstyles, the sudden departure of what could’ve been Tom’s true love, Ghostbusters, our experiences with the paranormal, Harry Potter, Apocalypse Now, porn parodies, ‘cars of jum’, The Walking Dead, Lost: The Video Game, sitcoms of the 90s, Dishonored, Doom, the alphabet, glasses face, Foghat, Fight Night Champion, Rocky VII: Adrian’s Revenge, Generic Cola, Skyrim, casual racism, SingStar, 50 Cent: Bulletproof, High School Musical, and Max Payne.In SSST: Federal judge throws out most of the PSN hack suit, Wii U gamers will need an Origin account to play online, Halo 4 was Microsoft’s most expensive game, Rockstar ramps up to announcing GTA V details, and GTA: Vice City gets a re-release.In Ask SSJ: we talk about teachers, Itty Bitty Schnitties, furniture stores, face-mashing, Chocolate Rain, General Pants & the Privates, Facebook hacks, apparent drunken

This week, we discuss Gustavo Almadovar, adjectives, theme music, Gaming Cult Podcast, pizza nightmares, the birds and the bees, karaoke, Ja Rule, Harvest festival, Wil Anderson, prophetic dreams, Steve Cannane, Lindsay McDougall, Tom's mysterious new finacé, Borderlands, Portal 2, Goof Troop, and GTA IV.In SSST: we talk about the Australian government's latest investment into game development, PlayStation Plus on Vita, PlayStation All-Stars Battle Royale's free DLC, Call of Duty: Black Ops II's massive sales, Xbox Live's 10th anniversary, and the Wii's new YouTube app.In Ask SSJ: we discuss divorce, happiness, Wreck-It Ralph, Altered Beast, superpowers, George Watsky, Facebook's post promotion grift, bad gifts, lasers, awkward sex, post-neo-irony, Molly Ringwald, circumcision, peeing standing up, spelling, off-brand products, the origins of toothpaste, offensive one-liners, and our drinks of choice.Then I make a brilliant pun to commemorate the passing of Thomas Filbert Sanderson (1993-2012).

This week, to celebrate our Metrically Significant Occasion, we invite as many guests as possible back onto the show for a Podcast Party! So, with Ruby Giles, Zac Innes, Max Skelton, and Alexei Toliopoulos in tow, we launch into our 50th episode.In SSST: we unveil the full details of Grand Theft Auto V, the Wii U's need for updates (and bringing your consoles Into The Internet Age), The Last Guardian's uncertain future, three delays from THQ, Metal Gear Solid 4's new special edition, Peter Molyneux's final game, and Sony's plan to launch the PS3 in China.In Ask SSJ: we discuss peeping Toms, unsafe neighbourhoods, hauntings, molestation, forest fires, infidelity, Kirk Van Houten, adult baby porn, gigantic misshapen hearts, bluebottles, the (sigh) 'utili-kilt', our favourite words, butt shaving, communicating with animals, our celebrity sex lists, and fictional objects we wish existed.Also featuring phone-in guests, a live performance of 'Ruby Eating An Apple',  background noise, techni

This week, we talk about David Hicks, mic technique, our visit to the Wii U Tour, the Curse of the 49th Episode, Disney's purchase of LucasArts, John Carter, Tom's love life, my 'funk' (DISCLAIMER: Please don't worry about me. I am doing fine. Thank you. I love you. Thanks for listening), Taylor Swift and the objectivity of taste, Forza: Horizon, Fez, Trials Evolution, Borderlands, and road safety.In SSST: we discuss Orbis dev kits, the Wii U tour, Portal 2's new motion control pack, and bad marketing vs good marketing: a showdown between Halo 4: King Of The Hill and American Express' new Card Sync promotion.In Ask SSJ: we jump into the future and skip a few suburbs to Sandsky's house to discuss counting, Skylanders, great analogies, the Ten Commandments, Tom's dog Hunter, the dirty lying Internet, our hatred of passive-aggression (followed by some pure passive-aggression on our part), helpful animals, religious tolerance, bad dates, sexy redheaded ladies, chafing, embarrassing injuries, wacky orgas

Rise and shine, Little Juans! It's time for Episode 45 of Something Something Joystick! This week, we talk about Billie Ray Cyrus, weird dreams, Cap'n Fishy, my vampire father, our love lives, old people fucking, Skyrim, coffee, Red Dead Redemption, plans for our 50th episode, and the gender of God.We talk about our experiences at IGN's Halo 4 Black Beta and EB Games' EB Expo (including shout-outs to Geek Bomb and the guys from IGN AU, as well as scoops on WonderBook, Tomb Raider, the WiiU and more, some analysis on the retailer-run expo... and Ray Romano).In SSST: Microsoft cuts Xbox 360 prices, Nintendo confirms WiiU region lock, Cliff Bleszinski leaves Epic, ex-Rare employees reunite for new project, Sony announces Vita's 10-year lifespan, Retro City Rampage gets a release date, as does The Unfinished Swan, and the internet creeps all over Dianna Agron.MUSIC USED:SSJ Theme 2 - Xavier Rubetzki Noonanyou and i - areographeHoroscopes - Astrid & the AsteroidsPower Supply - Ana

This week, the always hilarious 'Zesty' Zac Innes drops in on us, and we talk about cigarette packaging,  colostomy bags, Tom's love life, boy bands, gender politics, holodeck technology, PlayStation AllStars: Battle Royale, Tokyo Jungle, the adventures of Zac's Sim Philip McFly, and a horrific game of RollerCoaster Tycoon.In SSST: Nintendo cuts Wii console prices, Tom tries to get minors to blow him, Microsoft releases Xbox sales figures, the next Mass Effect game won't feature a Shepard re-hash, Nihilistic Software move away from boxed games, and Deadly Premonition gets a PS3 release.In Ask SSJ: We talk about our love lives again, classic jokes, cannibalism, sex with cartoon characters, fetishes, crappy Halloweens, crime sprees, weird things to masturbate to, definitive proof that evolution is a lie, and our take on the classic hypothetical - would you fuck or fight your clone?MUSIC USED:Kurt Vonnegut - Born RuffiansSSJ Theme 2 - Xavier Rubetzki NoonanGh00lz of Br00klyn - FB5K / CC BY-NC 3.0f

This week, on a very special Xavier's Birthday episode, we try out some new mic techniques and talk about hangovers, Taylor Swift and pedophilia, Mega Man X in bed, Ultimate Marvel Vs. Capcom 3, Banjo Kazooie, Donkey Kong 64, Mario Kart 64, Virtual Chess 64, a bizarre Super Mario 64 mission, Crackdown, and lying about enjoying a party.As a special birthday surprise, I barely put together any news this week, but I make up for it by barely putting together a theme song for SSST either. We do talk about a few things - those copies of Resident Evil 6 were totally stolen, the Killzone Trilogy is totally a thing, EA is totally uninterested in games with no online component, Darksiders II is totally saving THQ's bacon, Ubisoft announced a totally rad new AssCreed mobile game (Assassin's Creed Utopia), and Ace Attorney is totally coming to 3DS.We go long on the Ask SSJ this week, talking about cereal conspiracies, the Illuminati, laughing at friends' injuries, horrible drug trips, seeing each other's p

This week, we talk about our new mic setup, buffalo wings, IGN's Tekken Tag Tournament 2 Black Beta, Brain Soup, lazy editing, our upcoming Peanut Gallery special, Enslaved: Odyssey To The West, the Mythbusters, an update on our Bane impressions, SSJ Industries' boss Pendleton Pig, and Truth Or Lies, which we award our first official SSJ Seal of Disapproval.In SSST, we break down the WiiU's release details, talk about Inafune's new ninja-mech-zombie game, check out what people voted for on Steam Greenlight, get worried about what this R18+ rating really means, titillate each other with the ESRB's rating for Dead or Alive 5, and plug the heck out of Sifl & Olly's new show.We launch right into Ask SSJ, which leads to discussions of toughness, adulthood, milk-based conspiracies, classic literature for teenagers, lettuce, childhood delusions, the value of honesty, annoying phrases, clean breakups, body image, fetishes, and auteur directors.MUSIC USED:SSJ Theme 2: Xavier Rubetzki NoonanLaputa: Henry

This week, I spend most of the episode making Tom's hangover worse, as we discuss the (now sadly removed) Alligator In The USA, Lara Croft and the Guardian of Light and Red Dead Redemption. We then start fighting earlier in the episode than ever before.In SSST: Sony announces the new PS3 Super Slim, we discuss the future of the PS3, Bioware co-founders leave for beer-er pastures, Ubisoft leak their WiiU lineup, PS+ Vita details emerge, Slender gets a sequel, Gravity Rush gets a sequel, YOU GET A SEQUEL, Squeenix announces a Kingdom Hearts HD collection, and we decide what Keiji Inafune should do to spice up YAIBA.In Ask SSJ: We discuss large dildos in traffic, Tom's Wolverine penis, narcissism (and wolves), a communist utopia on the moon, bingo, James Colley, ringtones, torture, Louis CK, inner turmoil, Noni Hazelhurst, Pulp Fiction, and sex with your parents.MUSIC USED:SSJ Theme 2: Xavier Rubetzki NoonanHelix Nebula: Anamanaguchi / CC BY-NC-SA 3.0I Need A Life: Born RuffiansCLICK HER

This week, we discuss spring and French onions, soap operas, fear of love, Red Dead Redemption, Light & Easy, SEGA MegaDrive Ultimate Collection, Assassin's Creed III, Skyrim, Burnout 3: Takedown, OkCupid, and Padme Amidala.In SSST: PAX Australia will be held in Melbourne, Bioware announce Mass Effect Trilogy, Ubisoft announce Assassin's Creed: Ezio Trilogy, and PlayStation All-Stars Battle Royale's full roster has been released, with no Crash or Spyro in sight. Then we plan a sitcom about crack dealers... I swear, it just came up.In Ask SSJ: we discuss The Matrix, fax machines, space masturbation, the difference between cans and tins, Jim Henson, the ramifications of peeing in the shower, 1912 porn, The Matrix (again), Weezer, crispy chicken, the history of vaginas, and more.MUSIC USED:SSJ Theme 2: Xavier Rubetzki NoonanPiece Of My Baby's Sweet Motown Cake (Rehearsal Demo): General Pants & the PrivatesTroubled Dreams: Rushjet1 / CC BY-NC-SA 3.0So Much Love: Pablo J & the Lobsterett

This week, we talk about Cloud Four, the ethics of breakfast, choir, the myth of creation, the counterfeit bible industry, and Satan Satan Joystick. We almost talk about our love lives, favourite Pokémon, X-COM Enemy Unknown, Dishonored, and space jump.In SSST: THQ Asia Pacific closes Australian offices, Sony patents a temperature-changing controller, Rockstar Games Collection Edition I compiles some of Rockstar's best, Nintendo bumps New Super Mario Bros U down to 720p, Halo 4 leaks, and Diablo might've come to the Game Boy.In Ask SSJ: We talk about devious plans for revenge, a public access commercial break TV show, Tom's imperviousness to leg pain, toilet-based paranoia, one-night stands, annoying internet trends, and MILFs.MUSIC USED:SSJ Theme 2: Xavier Rubetzki NoonanLook Back: 2NRO8OT / CC BY-NC-SA 3.0Yellow Dust: Rolemusic / CC BY-NC-SA 3.0FEATURE TRACK:The Pieces - Cloud Four(Want your track featured? Email ssjoystick@gmail.com!)CLICK HERE to download!