Dear Men

Ever felt obligated to "take the next step" in a relationship -- for example, becoming exclusive, moving in together, getting married, buying a house, having children, etc.?Was it what you really wanted, or was it just what your partner or others thought you should be doing at that point?Millions of people quietly make alternative life choices and relationship choices -- but we rarely talk about them. Enter Amy Gahran and her book, Stepping Off the Relationship Escalator.In the world of sex, dating, and love relationships, the cultural norm is the "relationship escalator" -- it's the familiar rom-com plotline where you date, become monogamous, put a ring on it, get married, buy a single-family home in the suburbs (don't forget the white picket fence!), have children, and then only "win" at marriage if you stay together until death parts you. You never get to acknowledge attraction to anyone else, and you both avoid questions around emotional closeness with anyone outside your r