Minimum Viable Parenting

We've all done it. At one time or another, we have compared our children to someone else's. How many times have we said, "Look at so-and-so, why can't you be like them?" Certainly never said with a malicious intent, comparing children does lead to poor self-esteem. But why is it such a bad thing? Sometimes we use this trick as a means of getting the child to listen to us or to motivate them, but it is a costly strategy.Comparison sets children up for competitions they are not ready for. Comparing children creates winners and losers, when there can be none. Both sides of this competition cary unhealthy perceptions of their abilities and skills, and live the consequences of these early and illogical wins and losses that come when we compare one child to another. Ultimately, comparing children to one another hurts both sides and impacts their self-esteem.